Broken Girl

You missed a spot

Keep in mind there was my siser and i aswell as the twins, who were two years younger than i was, they were like Deedee but would not hit me. They sure liked to tell on me and get me on Deedee's bad side. They were a miniture Deedee,short,stocky and ugly. We had gone to a family dinner that night, it was to a buffet at a place called town and country, we had a good time, i dont think i have ever eaten so much in my life. The server took our family picture. A few days later we got the picture back from the store, i heard Dad and Deedee laughing in the kitchen, one of the twins came upto them and asked what was so funny? No one let me in on the secret, I tried to brush the laughter off and went to watch tv as i sat on the floor like a dog as i was not aloud to sit on the couch even if it was empty. I went into the kitchen and saw te dinner picture on the fridge, it was all of us. For some reason i was a bit red in the face, hey was that what they were laughing at? I wonder

Everytime someone went into the kitchen the pointed and laughed at me calling me Brother Love, if you ever watched wwf wrestling in the eighties he was a manager to one of the wrestlers, he had a red face. I didnt always have a red face, but they all got enjoyment out of calling me that. Something had gone missng in the house, it was a bracelet of one of the twins, i would never steal from my family but they assumed it was me. Dad fille dup the kitchen sink with cold water, he told me to place my hands in the cold water, he said he would come back in 10 minutes and ask me again if i took te bracelet. He set the times on the stove for ten minutes, he came and asked me "did you take it"? i said no. He said ok take your hands out of the water and hold them up, he reached into the kitchen drawer where they kept a leather belt. he clappe dit hard on his own hand. Did you take it?  he asked again , he slapped my hands with the leather belt 4 times, It stung so bad but i tried not to cry. He set the alarm again for another ten minutes, and again my hands back into the icy water, it felt good on my hot stinging hands. I watched as the clock counted closer to that next ten minutes, and then there it went again that alarm which brought pain. He told me jsut to confess, but i told him i didnt do it. I could see in his eyes that he knew i was a strong girl. this went on for almost one hour. Then i confessed to something i didnt do. Well now that i confessed what is my punishment i wondered?  Well the punishment was given right away he tanned my hide with that leather belt ten times. The pain was painful yes but it would have better if he actually hit me on the bottom like he intended.I guess i squirmed too much becasue he hit the back of my thighs

That night i was pretty sure that the next day i would leave again, i planned to runaway many times and dreamed about my adventures. The next morning for some reason Deedee said i was not going to school, i didnt know why, maybe a dr's appointment?  i guess she had saw what i didnt see.The back of my thighs were black and blue. I assume she thought i might open my mouth, which i probably would have to my friends only. I sat in my room all day behind the locked double deadbolt. I was aloud out after school had ended. You know i was so alone thinking about it now, i really dont know how i didnt take my own life. I guess i thought about what the future held. Deedee told me that it was time for a bath, now understand this i never bathed in clean water, i always used Deedee's leftover bath water or the twins, never dads. I walked to the bathroom and there she was waiting, she kind of had a sick obsession i think . She would leave while i got into the bathtub, and then she would come back in a few minutes. I would always sit with my knees upto my chest. She always guided on where to wash. Scrub there, and there, and over there. She was a sick woman who oviously got pleasure out of watching a 14 year old girl washing. Where was my privacy? i had none. She stood there watching every move i made, which i never understood why? The twins had showers and baths alone without her watching and here i was bathing in cool dirty water, being watched by my step mother.