Alcatraz || harry styles a.u

1

 {Chapter 1}

I actually felt a feeling. I feel like as if I wanted to die. I feel so much hatred for myself for bringing myself into this prison, into this horrible situation. I should’ve listened to my mother, Anne; she tried to convince me to stay with her. She told me that this was a dangerous decision to move to America with my father, that I should stay in the UK, finish high school, get my education and my life straightened up. No matter what she told me, I felt the need to live with my father and he left me again, leaving me with no money or way back home. Now I'm stuck with Alcatraz being new home.

When we got to a dock the officers finally put me onto the ferry, attaching the chains to make sure I won’t ‘escape’. This is chilly water. There is no way am I swimming in a jump suit and heavy shoes in chilly water that has the ability for my body to go completely numb.

I watch the people stand by the dock watching as the officers’ handcuff me, not saying a single word. As if they knew when I leave, the whole city will be suffered with danger and crimes. The ferry's motor is turned on and begins to move its way through the calm water.

My actions may seem calm and too mysterious, but honestly I’m panicking in the inside. 7 years in the federal prison on Alcatraz Island in the chilly waters of California’s San Francisco Bay, housing some of America’s most difficult and dangerous felons. I would never imagine myself as one of the most dangerous felons when I was little. Just like the old man said, it doesn’t suit me. This place wasn’t meant for a guy like me, or is it?

The odds are what fear me the most. What if I get sexually violated? What if I die out of an illness I catch?  What if the guards or staffs, what ever they are categorized by, treat me unfairly as if I were actually a really bad person?

“Well you are feared by the government and 33% of the city, so technically you are a bad person. You-“ My sub-conscious kicks in and I quickly shake my head so I don’t have to hear the rest. I am a bad person. Everything happens for a reason.

The ferry pulls up onto the island that I am already beginning to fear. I see a crowd of people surrounding the rock watching my every move. Some people are dressed in all black, some in uniforms, some families trying to stay out of sight.

I feel this numbness in my stomach that is currently attempting to travel up to my throat causing me to hold back my vomit. The officers untie my hands first and cuff them again behind my back. I begin to gag and the officer hurries to unlock my hands and feet from the floor of the ferry. They unlock my hands and hand cuff my hands behind my back. The moment they unlock my feet, I drag the officer towards the end of the boat so I can throw up my anxiety.

They just stand there awkwardly as my face turns red for lack of air because my stomach has nothing else to throw up.  Finally the officer pats my back and I inhale fresh air once again falling on my knees feeling sicker. My headache hasn’t healed for anything, it just keeps getting worse by the second.

I stand up and they guide me onto the boat slip to go up the island. The dock tower catches my view. I catch a glimpse of a guard with a gun pointing towards me watching every single breathe and move I take from afar.