Kim's POV 4 - The New Beginning

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The New Beginning

I was slumped down in my couch with an ice cream tub in my hands, tears in my eyes, Keith's jacket, that I had so discreetly taken away five years ago, beside me and 'The Notebook' being played on my television. Add to horror, I was actually liking the movie.

The world had come to an end.

The mighty sun had risen from the west, or was it the moon that was shining so bright at nine in the morning.

Okay, I was over exaggerating but this was not what I was supposed to do in heartbreak. I was supposed to go out of this place, discover a new city, get lost in the streets, click pictures till my fingers started aching and forget everything about a certain footballer who was getting married in merely an hour. But, I could not.

My shoulders slumped at the realization of the pathetic state I was in and no matter how much I tried, I couldn't stop the pettiness I felt for myself.

"Choose Noah, you idiot!" I shouted looking at my TV screen in futile hopes of making Allie listen to me and follow my golden advice. Maybe I could say the same to Keith. 'Choose me, you idiot! Not Veronica!' But it was me who had asked him to keep her happy under our deal and my loneliness along with my pathetic state of mind was making me regret my words.

The sound of doorbell made me snap out of my thoughts and my eyes wandered towards the door, as if it would open magically and I won't need to get up from my seat. Continuous rings made me frown as I paused the movie and told whoever my unexpected guest was, "Coming!"

I peeked from the hole and my eyes widened in surprise when I saw who was standing on the other side. A light gasp escaped my lips, but I quickly covered my mouth before he could hear me at all. How could I face him after everything I'd done to him?

No! I couldn't.

He continued ringing, but I just took a few steps backward, staring at my door in hopes of making him go from here.

The images of the last time I had seen him came in front of my eyes and I flinched at the hurt in his eyes, face and voice. And, it was me who was responsible for all of this. In the last five days, I had not only mourned over Keith, but Josh as well. And, here he was standing at my door, showing no mercy at the door bell.

I could pretend that I wasn't home. Right?

"Just open the door, Kim. You just said, 'coming'. So, I know you're inside," Josh said from the other side as if reading my thoughts and my eyes widened at my stupidity.

So much for pretending!

Biting my lips very hardly, I dried my face from any unwelcomed tears drained on my cheeks and took steps towards the door. I knew I had to face him now. I couldn't be a coward. I was done being a coward.

Taking a deep breath, I opened the door and found Josh waiting for me at the other side with his hands in his pants pockets. He looked fine, but not good. It was obvious from the faint lines under his eyes that he had a pretty rough time in these past few days and this just added to my guilt.

"O-okay," he said slowly as he looked at my face carefully and then my clothes. This was not one of my good times and I knew that I was looking miserable after all the crying and sulking I had done in the past few days.

Biting my lips, I stepped aside and asked, pointing my thumb behind me, "Wanna come in?"

He nodded his head quickly and entered. I shut the door beside him and turned around to look at him. I had no clue as to what he was doing here. Neither was I planning to pry. I was just quite happy that he was here as I really needed a friend at this hour.

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