"Who made up this lie saying I was dead? The fuck is wrong wit' you niggas." I said in a very obvious annoyed tone. "Bahja probably actually believed that shit and might've went to get another nigga."
DJ shook his head. "It wasn't on purpose, man. We were trying to protect you from Chino's other gang members who ever locked down wit' you. And then, we heard you got stabbed. Ain't nobody know what to think from there but, look you still alive and breathin."
"Fuck all that living and breathing shit, where the fuck is my girl? If I do recall, I remember leaving you and Tremaine in charge of watching her. Now, she ain't here so tell me what the deal is?"
There was a moment of silence between the both of them. They knew something but, didn't have the heart to tell me what was going on. And, that was only making the situation worst. When it comes down to her I don't play no games. I told them to keep an eye on her and that's exactly what they didn't do. Now what I have to do is refrain myself from killing them both or silting their throats as I should.
Tremaine cleared his throat before speaking. "Her father got a job in California, she left and went with him. There wasn't nothing we could do."
"We couldn't stop her from going home with her blood and plus it's her father at that. You know we would've tried everything to keep her here if we could." DJ chimed in.
"Y'all got any fucking idea how I'm supposed to get my girl back now? I'm pretty sure she's moved on by now being as though, it's been two fucking years."
So many things could've happened by this point of time. She could've forgotten about me and doesn't want anything to do with me anymore. Just the thought of someone else taking my spot pisses me off. Ain't no other nigga supposed to have her, she's mine and it's always been that way. Regardless of what it takes, I'm going to get her back.
"All you have to do is DM her on Instagram, she might not see it but it's worth a try. Post something about her too, she'll probably see that for sure."
I nodded and grabbed my phone, logging into the Instagram app. "What the hell is her Instagram name? It's not pinkyinthebrain anymore?"
"No, man. Her hair ain't even pink anymore." DJ laughed. "It's her full name but, not her middle name. Just Bahja Rodriguez."
"Aight, simple. I'll explain to her later about this being the only picture I have of us." I chuckled to myself at the picture as I uploaded it.
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"Now what we're going to do is make our way to Cali, I'm going to find her and that's that." I stood up from the couch and headed towards the door.
Nothing is going to stop me from finding her and claiming what's mine. Whoever her current dude is better be prepared for what's coming to him. Matter of fact, he better be prepared to have my girl taken away from him. And, I'm not playing any games. There's no choosing between the both of us either. She knows who her heart belongs to.
The boys and I packed up and loaded our things into the infamous truck of mine. Third day out of jail and I'm sure I'm about to catch another charge. But, to avoid all of that I'm more focused on her and not the drugs. She actually liked the fact that I was drug dealer at first. Being as though, she had everything she wanted and more. But, then she told me to stop because she felt like I was going to get caught up. And that's exactly what happened.
july 3, 2011. ┌ flashback 002. ┚
"Look, I'ma be straightforward with you. I'm sick and tired of you running these streets and risking your life because, of some silly drugs." She calmly walked around in circles.
I shook my head and leaned back on the sofa. "Baby, don't worry about it. I know what I'm doing and I promise you I won't get caught up."
"And how do you exactly know what? You aren't a physic and you damn sure can't tell the future."
"If your okay with being broke and having all of the designer gifts being stoped then, just let me know. Besides, I've been in this game for way too long just to drop out like that."
She paused her walking and stood in front of me. "Jacob, I don't give two shits about the designer gifts. I'm fine without any of that, I don't need designer to be a bad bitch. And, we can move somewhere else so nobody notices you dropped out of the game."
"That's not going to work, baby." I chuckled and pulled her into my lap. "Everything is going to be fine. I don't know how many times, you want me to tell you that but, it really is. I'm doing this for us and not only am I doing it for us but, for our little alien that's in there."
She's my entire world at this point. Letting this drug business get between us won't be happening anytime soon. Maybe I'll stop once our pride and joy is born. Until then, I'ma keep doing what I do.
— flashback over.
Ten hours into the ride and my thoughts had been getting the best of me. Memories were starting to come back, the worst and the good ones. I just couldn't stomach the thought of her being with somebody else. Not with all that we've been through.
"Ayo, Jake. We accidentally snooped through some of your things and we found these baby clothes. What were those for?" DJ asked.
"How do y'all accidentally snoop through my shit? But, Bahja was pregnant once upon a time and six months into the pregnancy she lost her."
"Damn." Tremaine spoke. "How come you never told anybody about this?"
I shrugged. "Because, I was the reason for her miscarriage and I'm not about to talk about this anymore."
Still to this day, I'll forever blame myself for our child to be gone. That right there was the start of her depression, I did all of that to her. I destroyed her.
—
more secrets? wow. yikes.
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QUESTIONS. 🦋 1. how do you feel about this chapter? 2. how do you feel about her warning him about selling drugs before hand? 3. the miscarriage wasn't necessarily his fault but, it did happen due to some dudes looking for him. they ended up beating her up badly resulting in the death of the baby. how do you feel knowing he blames himself for the loss of their child?
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