Divergent High

Chapter ten

Tris pov

I wake up in our cabin bed a little confused at where I'm at because I normally don't wake up in a cabin setting.

I run my fingers through my hair and sit up in the bed, keeping the sheets cover my naked body.

I look around the room to see where Tobias went but he's no where to be found.

I'm about to get out of bed and put some clothes on when he walks in the room.

"Good morning beautiful" he says coming to my side of the bed and giving me a morning kiss.

"Good morning" I whisper against his lips

"Last night was amazing" he says putting a strand of hair behind my ear

"Yes it was" I say smiling

"We still have another hour before we have to leave this place, we can recreate last night but only if you want to" he says leaving soft kisses on my neck

Without me giving an answer he gently looms over my body and pulls the sheets away from my naked body.

I moan as he kisses near my collarbone. I can feel him smile against my skin.

I tug at the end of his shirt as he kisses sensitive places on my body. He pulls off his shirt and I lean up and kiss all over his chest.

He pulls off his pants and I pull away and sigh

"Okay maybe we shouldn't recreate last night" I sigh

"Are you okay" he ask gently rubbing my cheek

"I want to. Oh how much I want ro" I say touching his abs

"But my body is a little sore from last night" I add

"It's okay. I understand" he says with a little laugh

"Ugh that was so embarrassing. I knew you were going to laugh" I say taking his shirt and putting it on sitting a few inches away from him. I cross my arms over my chest and pout.

"Tris. Baby" he says chucking and moving closer to me. He puts his hands on my waist and kisses my head

"Don't be embarrassed. You never have to be embarrassed in front of me" he says

"That is your body and if you don't want to have sex, we don't have to. It doesn't bother me" he says

"All I want is for you to feel comfortable as possible" he adds and I smile

"Sorry" I say letting out a deep breath

"Don't apologize" he says running his fingers through my hair.

I lean in for a kiss and a few seconds later deepen it. I pull away and lay on Tobias.

"Why did you put my shirt on you know I love your body" he says

"I was feeling self conscious" I say

"Why? your body is perfect" he says rubbing his hands up and down on my stomach

"Not as perfect as yours" I say

"When I gave birth to the twins the babies kind of left a little fat on my body that I can't get rid of" I add

"Well I see no fat all I see is beautiful flatness" he says

He was right I wasn't fat at all. I weighed basically nothing. I've always had a problem with my weight, which caused me to have an eatting disorder 3 years ago. I still sometimes struggle with eatting but I do eat.

"Can I tell you something I've never told anyone besides my parents and Christina because she's my best friend" I say as we sit in the middle of that bed, him holding me

"Anything my love" he says

"When I was 15 I had this obsession with looking like girls in magazines. I'm not going to lie I wasn't fat, I was actually really skinny but for some reason I didn't see it that way" I say

"So I first stopped eatting breakfast, then stopped lunch, then dinner, then basically food in general" I say tucking my hair behind my ear

"Your parents didn't realize you weren't eatting" he ask

"I guess not" I say

"Then one day I was feeling so sad and down that I started hurting myself because I thought that would make me better" I say crying

"To me I was the most ugliest person alive. I don't know why but I hated myself so much that I actually tried to kill my self" I say looking down at my hands.

"Well it didn't happen, obviously. I tried but my parents got to me on time." I say

I look at Tobias with tearful eyes and he looks at me with sad eyes.

"I only told you that because I want you to know about my past" I say

"Are you okay now? Do you need me to do anything" he ask holding my hands worriedly

"Tris I never want to lose you because you feel sad about something or because you think you're not beautiful enough" he says

"I'm better now. I got a lot of help from therapist and doctors." I say and he looks at me still with his sad eyes.

"I'm fine" I whisper to him holding his face with my hands.

"I never want to lose you" he whispers back

A few tears fall from my eyes and I kiss him. He keeps his hands on my back and pulls me closer as we kiss.

"If you ever want to talk about anything. You can always rely on me. I will always be there for you" he says

"Thank you" I whisper and give him one last long gentle kiss.

I pull away and smile as I hold his hands.

"Can I ask one question?" He ask

"Yeah anything" I say

"Where did you used to hurt yourself" he says quietly

I turn my hands over in his and show him my arms.

"If you look closely you can see some scars that was left behind and didn't heal all the way" I say and he traces them with his finger

"You don't still do it right" he ask

"No. I don't" I say

"Good" he says

"Is happy I have you in my life" he adds

"Me too. I don't know what I would do without you and our girls" I say

"I love you so much Beatrice prior" he says and I smile at him

"And I love you" I say

I hope you enjoyed that chapter, it was all over the place but I found it very different from most of my chapters. Comment. Comment. Comment.