Harry Potter Discovers Starkid

Act 2 Part 3

[Harry, Ron and Hermione are outside Dumbledore's office]

HERMIONE

Harry, why would Dumbledore want to meet us so late at night?

HARRY

Well he's got some information to tell us about Voldemort, so did you bring the Invisibilty Cloak?

HERMIONE

Yeah, I've got it right here.

RON

Well this better be good, 'cause I don't have a snack and I'm missing Wizards of Waverly Place for this. So what do we have to do thats so damn important- [Piano player suddenly hands him a package of Twizzlers] Oh my God, thank you! I love Hogwarts!

"I wish that happened in real life!" Ron said excitedly. Hermione rolled her eyes. "If it did, you would have gut already," she muttered.

HARRY

Hogwarts is amazing

RON

Here, you want one? [Hands on to Harry, ignoring Hermione]

Hermione rolled her eyes again. "Rude," she grumbled. Ron was meanwhile opening a package of what was called Red Vines. "Do you want one?" he asked her. She smiled and took one.

HERMIONE

Alright, I'm leaving!

Ron's eyes grew. "Oh. My God. These are amazing!" he exclaimed. He quickly handed one to Harry and Ginny. "Try these!"

HARRY

No no no wait! No you're not, no you're not! Okay, when I said I needed your help I meant  both of you. So you guys got to put aside these hurt feelings before someone gets hurt, okay?! Now come on. [Knocks on Dumbledore's door]

"But if feelings are already hurt, then...that just doesn't make sense!" Ginny said. She was inturptted by Harry yelling "I love Red Vines!"

DUMBLEDOE

Hello Harry. Oh!  Goddamnit! I told you to come by yourself, why did you have to bring the fatties?

Hermione and Ron scowled. "I'm not fat," they both said at the same time.

HARRY

Dumbledore, Ron and Hermione are my best friends and if this information is as important as you say it is, they have a right to know.

Ginny spit out the Red Vine, grimacing. "That was gross," she grumbled. Harry shook his head, a disbelieving look on his face.

DUMBLEDORE

Well, I've been wrong before. Get in here Hotcakes. [Hermione starts to follow Harry in] I was talking to Weasly!

Hermione grimaced even more. "Dumbledore thinks my fiance is hot," she said, shaking her head.

RON

Thanks! [Prances in front of Hermione]

[After they all enter the doorway, they exit the same way into Dumbledore's office, which has a desk, a chair, a bench and a Zac Efron poster stuck up on the wall]

DUMBLEDORE

Sorry the place is such a sty!

RON