Limerence | A James & Lily Story

Daze

     "Earth to, Prongs?" 

     "Wha-?" I drag my eyes from the blueberry muffin on my plate to see Remus staring intently at me with those wide, brown eyes. He arches an eyebrow as a silent question. "Sorry, Moony, I have no idea what you just said."

     He smiles sadly. "I was just wondering if you planned on actually eating today." 

     I look back down at my plate. Blueberry muffins are my weakness; they usually have my mouth watering and my stomach roaring. Today, however, I can't force myself to take more than two bites. My stomach seems to have turned itself inside out. In the past few days, I have forced myself to eat only because I know I have to eat as to not pass out.

     "James," Remus says with his serious tone. I look up once again to see compassion in those eyes. "I know you are worried about Lilly. Hell, we all are, but not taking care of yourself isn't going to do anyone any good."

     "I know," I agree. "But, it's not that simple. I look at her, and I don't know what to say. There is nothing for me to say to her. I can't bring them back. I can't make this pain go away. It's killing me, Remus. Everything she has ever known has been pulled out from beneath her, and I am utterly helpless."

      Remus takes a deep breath, swirling the coffee in his mug with a spoon. He sucks on the inside of his cheek and stares across the room with a deeply troubled look on his face. "Where is she?"

     "She skips breakfast and goes straight to class," I answer.

     He looks as if he wants to say something, but Marlene takes a seat next to me breaking up the conversation. She pushes her long, dark hair out of her face to reveal large, purple circles around her eyes. 

      "You okay, Mar?" Remus questions.

      "Peachy," she replies flatly. Sirius arrives as well taking the seat next to Remus.

      "How is she?" He asks, looking expectantly at Marlene.

      She takes a deep breath, holding a roll in one hand and a butter knife in the other. "How do you think she is, Sirius?"

      "I know," he replies sadly. "I just...I feel utterly useless."

     Remus makes a sound against the rim of his mug. "Join the club," he mutters.

      "Is she sleeping any better, Mar?" I question, slightly miserable that I have to even ask for information on my own girlfriend.

      She turns to me with a deadpanned expression before jabbing a finger in the direction of her eyes. "How the fuck do you think?"

      "Merlin," I reply. "I was just asking."

      "Sorry," she says hurriedly, looking down at her plate guiltily. "I'm running on very little sleep. I'm about this close to slipping her a sleeping draught." She holds up two fingers millimeters apart. 

      I lower my head into my heads letting out a deep groan. A tentative hand is placed on my back followed by a small pat. I look over to see Marlene looking at me sympathetically. 

      "Anyone else ever wonder how the hell we got here?" Sirius questions. I raise my head to look at him. 

      "I don't know about you, but I walked down the stairs," Remus shrugs.

      I smile for what feels like the first time in days. "You little shite," Sirius replies with a grin. 

      A small laugh escapes everyone's lip, and it feels like there is happiness in the world again. Until, the laughter fades, and we are all left to look at our plates in despair. A part of me wonders if our lives will ever go back to normal.