I'm sorry I haven't been updating a lot, its mainly because I have some serious depression and it gets ahold of me more than I'd like to admit, so I'm very sorry for the inconvenience but guys
I'm being for real
Now some of you are going to say this is self diagnosed,
But
I know I'm not just down in the dumps
I feel like I dont belong here, that I'm just anither mistake made in this world and that I generally dont fit in, even as a guy I still hate myself deeply, not as much as I did before I was a male, but... Still
And I know this is stupid and pathetic but
I feel like shit
Like I'm a horrible person and all I bring is tragedy where ever I happen to be
I seem to only make things worst
And every insult, despite apologies have been stuck in my brain. I feel like an absolute failure, like I'm not good enough,
Which is why I write, even if ts fan fiction I do it because I s one of the few things I CAN do without being judged too seriously, I know I know,
Its sad that this is what makes me happy
But its true
Beyond belief its true
So at the moment I'm just hoping my mother with let me be scheduled to be tested for depression, (even though, with my mindset and failed suicide attempts, its clear I have it) and finally get the medication I need to finally be back to normal again, back to the old happy and cheery me I used to be
And not the bitch sad me I currently am
