Each time I see Louis with that journal of his, my mind races. There are so many things that could be written on those concealed pages.
Is my name anywhere to be found in there?
"Earth to mommy" Belle stands in front of me, waving her hand in front of my face.
I pull myself from whatever dream land I was in and focus my gaze on the little girl in front of me.
"Hmm? Sorry sweetie. What were you saying?"
"I was asking when Liam was supposed to get here. I asked like five billion times but you were too busy thinking about Louis."
"Excuse you watch your sass level, missy. And you don't know what I was thinking about."
"It was Louis." She said back
"Anyways" I give Belle a look "He said around dinner time so in about an hour-hour and a half probably"
Annabelle groaned loudly before loudly stomping down the hall "I'm starving!" she called
"Patience, drama queen" I call back to Annabelle as she disappeared into her room.
I stand still for a number of seconds, reverting back to the thoughts I had pre-daughter- interruption. My thoughts take a slight turn and bring me back to when I used to keep a journal of my own.
I purse my lips together and head to my bedroom.
Sliding open my wooden closet door, I reach to the top shelf, pushing aside boxes till I uncovered a small navy blue chest.
I lay the chest down on my bed and unhook the silver latch which keeps the box secured.
Taking a deep breath, I open the chest.
Memories flood my brain as my eyes race to each different item.
A lace embroidered invitation is the first thing I pick up.
William Evans and Lacie Castelton joyfully invite you to share in their happiness as they unite in marriage
"So much for that" I scoff and set the invitation down.
My phone buzzes and I retrieve it from my back pocket. It's from Louis.
I half-heartedly read the text and send back a quick "K" before returning to my box.
Digging further down in the chest, I find it; The journal my mom gave me the day I got married.
My heart aches dully as I muster up the courage to open the book.
My phone goes off again and I put it on silent, wanting to use my full focus on this moment
I flip through the pages, stopping only a couple entries in.
My finger tips slowly graze across the dry ink scribbled across the page. I take in the words that were written. Each word was laced with love and happiness.
I get lost in the stories about the amorous dates Will had taken me on and the sweet words he once spoke to me.
A remorseful tear reaches my eye and trickles down my cheek.
I wipe my hand across my face, drying the wet line down my cheek.
The entries gradually went down hill, ending in me writing down my suspicions of Will and the time he was spending out of the house. And then that was it. The next page was blank. I had stopped writing.
Without thinking, I grabbed a pen from nightstand and began to write about Louis on the blank page.
"Louis Tomlinson, a far better man than William Evans" I sniffed, quickly writing down the words "He's sweet, kind, very good looking and not at all a tool-bag. In fact, I think I love him." I stopped my rushing hand and let out a laugh as I looked at my middle school gir-esque writing.
