Selfless

Chapter 16

Man, my head hurt and it felt so damn heavy. Everything just felt like a ton and I had no idea what the hell was going on. I couldn't remember where the hell I was or what was going on, but one thing that was for sure I felt unusually rested yet beyond drowsy.

If I ever got to hibernate like a bear, I could only imagine I'd wake up feeling like this, except I wasn't even really awake... I think.

Someone was holding my hand and I heard soft snoring.

My eyes opened. Huh, I am awake. I squinted a bit in the dark room and then looked at the bland walls. There was a lamp on a table that illuminated the room in a dim light. Looking around at the room, I knew for sure something was off, but my brain was being so slow.

Jesus Christ, I feel like I haven't thought anything for half a decade.

I zoned in on a table full of flowers and gifts, a couple of cards scattered around and on the table beside me there was a drawing that seemed oddly familiar. I twisted my eyes and lifted a hand, feeling a mask on my face. When I saw my hand, it had a needle in it and a tape to keep it in place, and slowly the fog in my head seemed to lift.

Grimiacing, I felt pain on my chest which made me lift up the blanket and gown to see a long bandaid between my boobs. I leaned my head back on the surprisingly soft pillow and exhaled. I looked down to my right hand again and saw a head resting on the bed beside my hand, and tattoos were all over the hand that was in mine.

Alexio.

Relief filled me and I carefully moved my hand from his, sinking my fingers into his soft hair instead. The soft snoring stopped right away and I smiled. He always snored softly except when I had my hands in his hair.

I just kept looking at his sleeping face that was facing me and I ran my hand through his hair. He needed a haircut soon, that's for sure. I knew he never cut it much because he loved when-

Images flashed in my head and I frowned slightly at him crying. Memories from that night appeared and I took some deep breaths to calm down again. I'm okay. And he's here. Alexio is right here and when I looked back to the drawing and saw his things all over the room, I knew he'd always been here.

He never left me.

Tears ran down my cheeks quietly as I could only imagine how he must have felt. I'd been kissing Adam right in his face, talked about Adam to him and oh how cruel I was. His poor heart. I'd stomped all over it without knowing yet it was so fucking obvious.

Of course, he loved me. Of course. I should have seen it years ago.

He'd always gone out of his way to make me happy. Learned how to braid, painted my nails, taken dancing lessons with me, played an instrument because I said it was cute, colored the lotus red because it was my favorite color, given me half of his cookie even after I'd eaten a whole because he knew I loved them. He'd always given me everything. Everything good in my life was because of him.

"I'm sorry," I sobbed slightly now and tried to wipe my tears away. I'd hurt him.

Alexio's face scrunched up slightly and I saw his eyebrows twitch a bit before his long eyelashes fluttered and he opened his eyes sleepily. He blinked few times before he jolted and his eyes widened. His beautiful gray eyes moved to my face and he jumped forward, taking my face into his big hands.

"Oh my God, hey, does something hurt? Do you want me to get the nurse?" he rushed out and wiped away my tears. I just shook my head and placed a hand on top of his. "I don't understand... Why are you crying?" he asked me with sad and worried eyes. I placed a hand on the mask and he looked horrified.