My Soul to Reap (Archived)

Decision

My heart skipped a few beats before picking up the pace furiously. Aryan had seen her too, and swore under his breath.

"How did she even get in?" he hissed, gently taking my arm and steering me away from the edge of the balcony. There was no point in acting insulted because it was probably a good thing I didn't get the chance to fall off the balcony in shock. The throbbing music that used to seem so inviting now pounded uncomfortably against my skull.I could feel my breath speeding up even as I tried to calm down,which only made me panic farther. I stumbled after him, up another flight of stairs to the third level. I could still see her, because the crowd seemed to sense her coming and leave just enough space not to touch her. Not fear, just instinct. I forced my breathing down,and Aryan's constant presence was helping a little with that.

"Now what?" I asked, and it only came out a little bit above a whisper. He shook his head, glaring Brie down.

"Now we get her out," he assured, resting a hand on my shoulder and motioning to someone behind us with the other. My heart was in my throat, and I could feel my eyes burning. This was so far from what I'd expected to happen it almost wasn't funny. I wasn't sure what I should be feeling, and the numbing of the alcohol didn't help in the slightest. I didn't notice I was shaking until Aryan started asking me if I was okay. I took a deep breath and, fuelled by confusion and intoxication, I raced down the stairs.

It really was a small miracle that I didn't fall over, but soon I was on the ground floor. People were everywhere, raising the overall temperature and succeeding in further confusing me. I tried to press through the crowds, not sure exactly where I was going but having a vague idea that Brie had gone straight. My head felt too light, and I was all too aware of the uniform rhythm everything around me was moving to. Eventually I found that if I moved with it, if I let the music take hold of me too it wasn't hard to slip into the crowd. It felt wrong, like every sense was being invaded by the music and the people. I almost wanted to throw up. There was a perverse sense of irony here, the fact that I'd wanted this so badly earlier and now I just wanted- needed- to get away. My reasoning didn't make sense, and I knew that- I'd pretty much firmly decided Aryan was in the right here, so there was no reason to go after Brie. Except, there was.

The music faded out, to a round of cheers and applause. It made it significantly harder to get through the dense mass, and eventually I was forced to strain to look over people's heads to see where I should be going. It didn't help much.

"Yeah, yeah, I know I'm perfect." Skylla laughed, her voice carrying through the speakers. "I'll be back though." The cheering pretty much hadn't stopped, and a slightly less intense version of the music she'd been playing started up again.

"Goddamn you people are drunk," she called, and it was met with another cheer. I heard her laugh as she took off the mic, and I finally saw an opening. It was a split second, people moving away, but I could see Brie. So I ran for it. I shoved a few people out of the way,trying vainly to follow the girl as she looked for me. The crowd suddenly ended and we were under the balconies, a temporary calm. A moment alone. I didn't think she'd seen me yet, but then again that didn't mean she didn't know I was there.

With the DJ gone, it seemed quiet. A little too quiet for a nightclub, but it might have just been my imagination. Brie turned slowly.

"This wasn't supposed to happen." It wasn't the best of opening lines,but it's what she gave me. She hadn't even looked at me yet. "You weren't supposed to come here like this."

"What,not on your side?" I asked, stepping closer. Everything in me was screaming to run back to Aryan, to get out of here, but that didn't look like it was happening. She shook her head fiercely.

"Cammie, this isn't what I wanted."

"You just said that." I spat. There was a moment of silence,stretched long and thin.

"Everything is happening too fast. No, don't- just listen. Please." I stepped back a little, narrowing my eyes while she struggled to get the words out. "If you were ever going near this I wanted you to know what you were doing. The training I promised you and you never got. None of this is fair for you and yeah it's mostly my fault, I'm not running away from that." My eyes widened at her sincerity.She glanced over my shoulder and I did too, only to find the huge bodyguard from upstairs and two guys who looked like his twin brothers pushing through the crowd.

"Cammie, this isn't something I can rush you into doing," she said, even as the words themselves rushed out. "But these people are dangerous. No one in this building gives two shits about you and even though I am a huge bitch who's horrible at explaining things I'm going to at least try and protect you and-" she stopped herself,but I knew where it was going. And I also knew there was no answer I could give her. I shook my head slowly, and the reality of the situation hit me. My gaze swept around the small space we were in,hyper-aware of both Brie and the bodyguards. And while i would have liked to kid myself and say it was easy to stand and make my decision, I was terrified. So I bolted, past Brie and out the door.

The air outside hit me with surprising cold. The alleyway was quiet, and the sound of the door banging resounded off the walls. I shuffled backwards, glancing around and trying to figure out if I was really alone. I could hear muffled talking and laughter a little farther down the alley, presumably where it reached the main street.

My back hit the rough wall and I sighed, closing my eyes and dropping my head into my hands. A few deep breaths later and I wasn't any more clear on what exactly I should do. It was impossible to hear anything that was happening inside the door, so that couldn't influence my decision.

As much as I didn't want to admit it, this whole time I'd just been dragged around. I'd yet to be able to make a single decision for myself, not really. First Brie had taken me in and then Aryan had,and now there was no way around it. This decision would be final.

And then it hit me.

Home.I was going to go home. I nodded to myself, pushing off the wall and standing up straight. People were looking for me, after all. The gravel crunched a little under my feet, and it seemed like this place didn't get a lot of traffic. Screw Aryan and Brie and this war. I was going to go home,and nothing could stop that. I started walking, forcing each step probably more than I should have. The talking got louder, and my resolve had shaken enough to warrant stopping to listen to the conversation. I slammed back against the wall, cursing myself. It was Skylla, and I wasn't sure how easily I was going to be able to explain myself if she asked.

"-knows who did it?" That wasn't her, at least, but I recognized who it was anyways, which made my escape harder. Carter, nice as he'd seemed, was also very firmly on Aryan's side. I cursed to myself.

"Jun probably does. Anyways, I can get around it because, well, I'm me."I frowned, since I'd obviously picked the exact wrong time to tune in. They were laughing again, and they were definitely both drunk. I considered chancing trying to get past them, since drunkenness and coherence didn't exactly go hand in hand. I steeled my resolve and straightened my shoulders, giving one last glance behind me before setting off.

I wasn't alone anymore. I turned around fully, opening my mouth in either explanation or greeting. But nothing came out, because I'd seen this scene before.

A dozen people, blankly serious and making their way towards me. Their eyes were dead, blank of any signs of life. At this point I knew what that meant.

They were zombies.