The Optimum Project: Revised Edition

Chapter 6

The Helper's Dilemma

"Dad, honestly, it's fine. Brea said the captain kept an emergency transmitter in his cabin, she's looking for it now." I said nonchalantly, "There'll be people from their company here to get the ship back, and Brea will probably transfer to another ship within the company, I don't see what the issue is."

"Noah, we don't even know her, why do you feel obligated to stick around?" my dad asked, his tone conveying his frustration over the comm.

"It just doesn't feel right, like... I don't know... leaving things unfinished." I finally managed to say. My thoughts were drifting like space debris, I was running low on sleep.

My dad's sigh was emphasized by static, but what he said next seemed to come through as if he were right next to me, "You know, it always bothered your mother that I had a tendency to leave things unfinished. "

I stayed quiet, my dad rarely ever talked about mom and I wanted to hear everything he had to say.

"She used to say that, oh what was it... 'To start a project is to give birth to an idea, to work on it until it's completion? Like raising a child and finally letting it be an adult.' after which she'd say something along the lines of 'god help our kid if we ever have one.'" he sighed again, drifting off down memory lane as he probably thought of would-haves, could-haves, and should-haves.

I knew the story of how my parents met, my mom had been a popular ballerina on her home planet. The Alliance spacial navy had some business in the system and the battle cruiser my dad served on had stopped to resupply. I...

"I don't think you've done too bad of a job," I said softly

"You're a good kid Noah, despite having a bad father." He murmured, "I want to make a deal with you, okay?"

"Sure, go for it," I said, "anything."

"There's a transmission beacon not far from here, I want  to go send a message to Lilly."

"Okay, so what's my end of the bargain?"

"I just want you to be careful, Noah." He said tentatively

I swallowed, "I think I can do that."

I could hear my dad shift in his seat, "Okay, I'd better get going or I'll end up leaving by the time they get here."

"Okay... I love you."

"Love you too buddy, no matter what happens."

We sat there in silence, neither one of us want in to hang up quite yet... Static being our only companion until finally my dad did the deed and terminated the connection.

I sighed as I leaned back in the chair I was in, letting my mind wander back through the story of my parents. I used to imagine the scenario: My father and his shipmates looking for something to do, stumbling around in the street after having been kicked out of the bar. One of his friends, Charlie I think my dad said his name was, had noticed the poster for a ballet and had convinced them to go and ogle at the girls for a bit.

"You can't even imagine how I felt at that moment Noah; when I walked in and saw her... It was like..." My dad from years ago paused and ran his hand through his hair, the alcohol he drank earlier that evening had loosened his tongue a bit. I could remember what happened next, I had said...

"Like what dad?" a nine-year-old version of me sat on the end of my dad's bed, his eyes wide and desperate for more information about his mother.

"It was like..." he squinted his eyes and lifted his hands, "like staring at a star without UV shielding... it hurts to look at but is too beautiful to look away..."