The Optimum Project: Revised Edition

Chapter 5

The Survivor's Guilt

The airlock door closed behind me as I entered the pressurization chamber and soon it was filled with a breathable nitrogen-oxygen atmosphere that my suit registered as safe. I removed my helmet and took off the suit, hanging it inside a vacant alcove and stretching the cargo net over it to keep it from falling out or getting sucked into space.

I walked to the interior door and opened it, no point in adding security to the interior airlock door because the outer had plenty, nobody could get past it unless they had the code or were invited, like me. Which begs the question, why was I invited?

The halls were dim, the fluorescent lights flickering every-so-often as I traveled down the hall, unfamiliar with the ship's layout. I finally came to an intersection and decided that calling out might be the best bet here. "Hello?" I yelled, "Is everyone alright?"

Real smooth, I just ooze confidence. In my own defense, it was the best I could come up with.

I heard a groan come from the left of the intersection and decided that would be the best way to go, my boots thumping on the metal grates that served as the floor. The groaning grew louder as I neared a part of the hall where it turned a corner and mentally braced myself for what I might find when I rounded it. A zombie? A space beast escaped from containment?

Nope, it was a dying man.

He was braced against the wall, cradling a tube in his arms while his body shook from the pain of his wounds. One of his legs was twisted at an odd angle, the other bleeding from what looked like shrapnel damage, bits of metal catching the light every time he shifted. A large cut ran across his forehead, his hair matted with the blood that was also dripping into his eyes and running down his cheeks like tears. He was muttering to himself, berating himself really, saying "My fault" over and over like a mantra.

It was Clipper.

I crouched down next to him, "Clipper?" I asked tentatively, I barely recognized him from the person I had talked to at the spaceport.

He opened his eyes and stared at me for a moment, uncomprehending, before he started nodding, his mantra changing, "You, yes, yes, you..." his eyes glassed over for a moment before he seemed to snap back into focus and he shoved the tube into my hands, "Take, take, safe, keep safe."

I tried to shake my head 'no' and hand it back to him but he started becoming hysterical, "TAKE!!" he screamed, shoving the tube back into my hands so hard I fell over. By the time I had gotten back up he had placed himself firmly against the wall, staring into nothingness and his mantra changed again, this time to something much more morbid than 'I failed'.

"Dead, dead, already dead, failed and dead, all dead." he murmured.

"Clipper?" I said, I didn't know what to do, I needed to make sure this ship was secure and safe to be on but I also didn't want to leave Clipper.

He looked at me, his eyes showing the most mental clarity I had seen since he'd been like this, "Go, I'll be fine, save the ship, I'll be fine."

He closed his eyes as his breathing slowed, "Fine... I'll be fine."

I watched him for a moment as his breathing remained slow and steady... he'd fallen asleep.

I looked at the tube and then back at Clipper, I didn't have any medical supplies but if I got to the bridge I could pull up a map of the ship. I wasn't leaving him to die, I was making sure I could find the medbay and take him there.

Then why haven't I moved yet?

It was that question that kicked me into gear, I couldn't waste time trying to find the medbay, I had to go to the bridge and find a map, I'd contact my dad and let him know everything was fine, and clipper and the rest of the crew would be saved.