Tomoe's Sister (kamisama Hajimemashita) [UNDER EDITING]

...the siblings...{part 1}

Nanami POV

I have to face my harsh reality whether I'm alone or not.
I'm going to try...
At least make them remember one thing I do before I can peacefully die...
I want to tell them how I feel...
That I want to come back here...
That I want to stay...
That I'm doing this for them...
I didn't want to be a monster...
I didn't want to be a disappointment...
I don't want to be a disgrace...

'Tomoka...you don't have to'

I wonder why Tomoka would say that...
And I wonder why I never bothered to listen to her feelings.
Why is it that I can hear her mind now?
A light chuckle could be heard in my mind.
'That my child was my doing.'
"Who are you?"
'Well child I am Tomoka's nine tailed fox.'-nine tail
"Nine tail..." I whispered
'Yes. And as to why you could hear her thoughts well...I did that.'-nine tail
'Why?'
'Because my dear,Tomoka has suffered a lot by her mother...the way she thinks and behaves was all because of her mother.'-nine tail
'Wh-'
'Before you go and tell Tomoe...I wanted at least one person to understand Tomoka....she's been through so much and I'm proud,she's been alive for soo long and no ones been able to understand her pain...and she's had to live through that pain.'-nine tail
'But why doesn't she say anything?'
'Because she thinks it's unnecessary...and at the time...if she were to have told someone of her problem they would have laughed at her or maybe worse shun her.'-nine tail
'She had to go through so much all alone...I'm sorry I never bothered to understand how she feels...'
'......What Tomoe did didn't help either. He shunned her as if she was filth just like his mother...that was one of the reason I chose Tomoka. I knew Tomoka would be strong...but I never thought she almost died.'-nine tail
'Almost die?...what happened?'
'Long story short......there was a time where she gave up and...almost died. Though I'm telling you this I won't tell you why...Tomoka doesn't remember it but....she will soon...'-nine tail
'Was it her mother?'
'..........everything started with her mother.'-nine tail
Tears kept coming.
I didn't know why I never bothered to understand how she feels and now I feel so stupid.
It's no wonder she put up walls...
She's afraid of getting hurt again.
'It's not that she's afraid. She.....she doesn't want to let you guys in because if she were to lose you she would break....she's lost a lot of people dear to her and she doesn't want to lose more...she also doesn't want to feel that pain again...'-nine tail
'...the people she lost...how were they able to get in?'
'.......it was...Tomoka who chose to let them in. She didn't really PLAN on making friends...but they were very persistent and eventually she gave up on asking them to leave her alone...heh I remember her always smiling and laughing with those people...'-nine tail
'...is it really ok for you to tell me this much?'
'......no......but she'll thank me later~well I have to go now because Tomoka is coming your way~'-nine tail
'Yes...thank you for telling me and goodbye...'

I went to the bathroom to wash my face and went out to the living room.
I found Tomoe there reading and so I sat in the farthest corner and watched TV.
Tomoe saw what I did and asked what was wrong.
I looked at him with tears in my eyes which worried him as he came running over.

"We've done everything wrong Tomoe..."
"What are you talking about?"-Tomoe
"Tomoka-"
"I don't want to talk about her."-Tomoe
"Tomoe!!! You don't understand!!! I heard her thoughts......she...she wants to fix everything before..."
"Fix what and before what?"-Tomoe
"...She plans on fixing everything with us...before she....she dies..."
"Fix us?...is she an idiot? How can she FIX us."-Tomoe
"She did everything because she wanted us to be safe....and she didn't want to lose us and feel that pain of losing someone again..."
"Ok...but what about the BEFORE SHE DIES PART! "-Tomoe
"...I don't know..."
"YOU DONT KNOW?!"-Tomoe
"I didn't know she thought about herself like that...she plans on fixing everything with us and then the council after...she's probably tired..."
"Why should we care though? Wasn't it her choice? Let her do as she pleases just know that I don't welcome her."-Tomoe
"HOW COULD YOU SAY THAT?! You were also one of the reason she's like this!!!"
"...What are you talking about?"-Tomoe
"YOU! You shunned her...you treated her like trash when you were the only person who could've done something..."
"......"
"Nothing to say because you know it's the truth? You knew you could've done something but you chose not to."
"......shut up..."-Tomoe
"If you had done something against your mother then maybe JUST MAYBE Tomoka wouldn't be so angry at you!!!"
"......I wanted to help..."-Tomoe
"No."
A new voice came from behind us which made both of us turn around.
"No you didn't that's why she's like this...it's because of you."-Takashi
"What do you know?!"-Tomoe
"Of course I know. Before I took her I've been watching her. I've seen how you and your mother treated her...do you even know what your mother did to her when--"- Takashi
"I think they've heard enough."-Tomoka