Bad Romance(Book 6)

Chapter 16-Final Goodbye

"Goodbye is the most final way to solve a problem..."

It was getting close to the last show of the tour and Shannon couldn't think of a better time to give Anka a gift. Christmas was two months away and Anka was already getting busy with the awards season.

After the music awards season she had the movie awards season coming up, where she was asked to receive honorary titles for Jared's work and she was  also asked to present the SAG Awards.

It was also time for Anka to have a dose of reality, pain regarding. Despite the fact that Shannon enjoyed sneaking away with her to have sex or to cuddle, he didn't enjoy the state she was in. And he didn't like where this was going. He felt that they both invested feelings in what they had, but couldn't ever manifest them. Not in public anyways.

On top of that, Anka was in denial ever since she found out about Emma being pregnant with Jared's kid. Shannon hated Emma for doing that, but he couldn't help but feel curious regarding her new niece. Her name was Ariana and Emma sent him a lot of photos with her.

Ariana looked more like Emma than Jared and from what Emma told him she was very energetic and sweet.  He couldn't wait to finish the tour so he could go and meet her. The bad blood that he had against Emma faded the second he saw Ariana's pink face and cute eyes.

He heard Anka walk in the hotel room, carrying a lot of shopping bags.

"Hey, what's up? I did some Christmas shopping for the kids. Before I need to head into all the madness. What's with that face on you?", asked Anka  cheerfully, leaning to kiss him the second she put down her bags.

"I wanted to talk to you...about something...and I don't want you to shut the idea down. Hear me out. And please don't get mad.", said Shannon softly, pointing to a seat next to him on the couch.

Anka took a seat on the couch and Shannon took her hand in his.

"What do you want to talk about? Shan, what is going on? Is everything okay?", asked Anka with a hint of concern in her voice.

"Well...calm down, everything is okay. But are you okay?", asked Shannon, slowly caressing her cheek.

"Why wouldn't I be?"

"I'm sensing that you're trying to dodge the pain. The pain of losing Jared. As much as I love you, and I really do, I don't want to make you forget about my brother."

"Shan what are you talking about? I sing your brother's songs, every single night. I deal with his businesses. We have three kids together. How can you say that I'm forgetting about him?"

"I'm talking about this little one. This isn't who you are. You aren't the one to be cheerful in interviews. Even at that Radio France, you seemed to have moved on as if he didn't matter anymore.",  said Shannon softly.

"Shan...what are you trying to say? That I'm not allowed to be happy?"

"I want you to be happy, but I also want you to think about things properly. This happiness that you show isn't who you are."

"Shan I'm happy because you make me happy."

"Baby, you like the idea of me making you happy. As much as I want to do this with you and be there every single day you wake up and every single day you go to sleep, as much as I love the kids as if they're my own, we both know we will never be together. Not in the way we want us to be. It pains me to tell you this...and believe me it took me every amount of courage to tell you this, but you know if we go public it will fuck up everything we worked for.", explained Shannon.