It's Loud Inside My Head

And the Game Begins

"Jackson," I gasped.  "What are you doing here?  Aren't you supposed to be at dinner?" 

He looked confused, "We had dinner hours ago.  Don't you remember?  You were there."

"No, I excused myself.  My head was hurting."

"No.  I know you were downstairs."

"Wait.  Hours ago?  What time is it?"  I looked at the clock hanging on the wall, "11:59."   How did that happen?  "We have one hour to sneak out."  I turned towards the door and he grabbed my arm. 

"Please Eva, don't leave just yet. We have time," he looked at me with his eyes pleading.  My resolve melted.  I closed the door and sat on the floor.  He sat next to me, and put his hand over mine.  I am not a fuzzy person.  I don't know how to be romantic and sweet and loving.  It's just not in my nature.

I felt his face next to mine.  I knew that he wanted to kiss me, but for some reason I couldn't.  He drew back.  "What's wrong?"

"Nothing.  I just want to get out."

"I'll take care of you.  It won't be long.  I promise."  I sighed.  Five minutes wouldn't hurt, I thought and I closed my eyes, and leaned back in to kiss him. 

Jackson wasn't there.  I fell forward, and landed on my stomach.  "Oof." 

"Eva, why are you laying like that?" Gabe appeared. 

I sat up.  "Is Jackson here?"

"Jackson?  Who's he?"

"You know, Jackson.  Tall, brown hair, about seventeen."

Gabe giggled, "I was just playing with you.  He's coming up the stairs now from dinner."

I froze, "What time is it?"

"Time to get a watch," and he turned promptly and walked out.

I stared into the empty space for a little while.  My thoughts began to play with me again.  Two years ago, my family kicked had me out, calling me insane.  They had no proof, but what was I supposed to do?  I've spent some time in an insane asylum, and I've sworn never to put another person through that.  I began to wonder if my family really had proof. 

I shuddered.  A shadow leaned in and whispered in my ear, "You did nothing wrong, Eva.  What happened, had to happen.  You know that.  We never did anything wrong.  We are in this together, you and me."

The shadow hissed, "You know you can't back out."

I fell backwards and hit the wall.  The shadow was gone, but the spot where I had hit my head earlier was killing me again.

"Shhh... It's ok," Jackson had wrapped his arms around me.  I felt the tears run down my face.  "Shhh.  You're safe here."

I snapped out of it.  "Jackson, what time is it?"

"11:59.  Why?"

I gasped.  "We need to get out of here."  I tried to stand up, and fell back down.  My head hurt too much. 

"We can always leave tomorrow at noon."

"No.  Now."

He crossed his arms.  "I like it here.  I'm not leaving yet."

"Fine then.  I am."

I grabbed my things, and ran downstairs to the front door.  Fiona followed me outside.  Turning the knob, I found that this time, I was able to walk out.  I heard something crash inside the manor, and I chuckled.Jane must be looking for me.  Looking outside, the moon was full again, and the night was warmer.

"Meow."

"We're safe kitty." 

I inhaled deeply.  Oh, to breathe the fresh air again.  I thought I'd never see the outside again. 

I began to walk down the sidewalk, looking around.  "Jackson, do you-" then I realized he wasn't there to enjoy this with me.  I am tired.  So so so tired of being alone.  And for 24 hours, I wasn't alone.  I had forgotten what that felt like.

I knew what I to do.  I turned back around, and walked back inside the house.  Jackson and I were coming out together, or we wouldn't come out of Hawthorne Manor at all.

                                                                          ***

 I watched the house carefully, looking for a way in.  If Jane or Gabe saw me, I'd be over with.  My plan?  I didn't really have one.  The basic thought was to sneak in, grab Jackson, and sneak out.  In less than forty-five minutes.  How will I?  No clue.  Is it even possible?  Nope, probably not. 

I saw Jane coming towards the window I was peeking through, and I ducked quickly down.  She looked out; I think she was just gazing at the night.  Don't lock it, don't lock- good.  Closing the curtains, Jane left, and I could hear her in the kitchen.  Good.  She's far enough to not hear me up the stairs.

Carefully sliding the window open, -thank goodness Jane didn't lock it- I poked my head through, looking for any sign of a threat.  None.  It was quiet.  Almost too quiet.  Left leg, right leg.  I left the window open, and closed the curtains, hoping the wind wouldn't move them. 

Now, to find Jackson.

A/N Pic of Jane on the Side---------------->

On a more personal note, this was a hard chapter.  All of my chapters are hard, and yes, I do gripe and complain about "Oh woe is me.  This has been sooooo hard," but I spent a LOOOONG time trying to get into Eva's shoes, thinking, "How would she react to this or that?  What is she feeling here?" and I must say that I really enjoyed the challenge.  I find that it gets harder as I go, and I suspect that's how it's supposed to be.  Progressing with the story and characters means things get more complicated, so you end up with a large number of headaches.  Where am I going from here?  I'm not quite sure.  I'm suffering from temporary writer's block.  But... Aha!!  I've just gotten the most brilliant idea in the history of brilliant ideas!!! 

 Off to write now,

Sarah