Secondhand Girlfriend

Deleted Scene

Running my hands through my hair, I take a few deep breaths as I walk down the street. Air, that's all I need. Just to get my head together, because o my fucking god I jave no idea what the fuck just happened. Who does that? He has balls of steel to even do that, I know I couldn't.

I'm angry, confused, and all out hurt that he would do something like that. Sure she was quote unquote "the love of your life", but you don't do that to someone else! We're friends, or at least are supposed to be and he does that. And the more I think about it, the more anger builds in me.

My stride is quick as I make my way back to the bakery, and my blood seems to be boiling in my veins. I grit my teeth discretely as I push through the glass door, and I see Lisanna is still perched on her stool at the counter. Maurice is nowhere to be found, which makes me more angry; where did he go?

"Lisanna," I snap, and her head whips up from her phone. "Where is he?"

She doesn't speak right away, but instead assesses my state of being as her eyes dart about my face. Looking back at the door that leads to the kitchen, Lisanna sighs as she stands from her seat. This causes a small wave of wariness to come over me, and I furrow my eyebrows at her.

"I think we should talk," she says, coming toward me and I take a step back.

"There really isn't anything for us to talk about, we're going home."

"And that's what we need to talk about, I'm not going home with you.”

The words take me for a loop, making me stare at her with confusion blatantly on my face. What is she talking about?

“Of course you are, why wouldn't you?”

“Can we go outside to talk about this?”

“Or we can stay right here, and you can tell me why the fuck you aren't coming home with me.”

Now she seems taken back by my anger, but I'm starting to see red. If she's doing what I think she is, I think I might break something.

“Maurice is taking me home,” she says boldly, puffing out her chest.

“You're fucking joking, really, Lis,” I seethe, my teeth clenching as I stare at her.

Lisanna looks away from me, and shrugs her shoulders as she taps her finger on her thigh. This drives me up the wall, she just shrugs, like this is nothing. She shrugs like we're nothing.

“You're not leaving me, this, this is not happening,” I grit, my breathing becoming heavier.

“I still love him,” she says, and my chest has never hurt this bad.

This loud echo rings in my ears, the words repeating themselves and burning into my psyche. I stare at her with my body shaking, and a hand clenching around the smooth pendant on my chest. My throat is dry as I try to find words to speak, but nothing will come from my parted lips.

Shaking my head, I back away from her and leave the bakery, alone. I came with my girlfriend and her friends, but left by myself. As I climb into my truck, I lay my head back on the rest and try to keep myself from crying. Once I feel like I can control the stinging in my eyes, I call my mother. Of course I get her assistant, so I leave another message for her then hang up.

I still love him. A dagger to the heart, and with each repetition of it in my head, there is a wound much deeper than the last.

{just to clear up how Kisanna ended. bye yall!}