Beyond Me. {Haylor}

Chapter Two.

The two weeks flew by and before I knew it I was in Omaha, getting ready for opening night. My nerves were undecided, and in the end they went away. I stood in black leather shorts with sparkle tights underneath. A Lacey white fitted shirt fit my bust beautifully. Harry had helped me pick out the opening outfit. My straight blonde hair would soon be sitting beneath a black hat that would belong to some lucky fan front row.

I sat in my dressing room, the door closed. I could hear Ed playing through the speakers. The fans were reacting to him more than I thought, which made me more ecstatic. My toes tapped within my red oxfords against the carpeted floor. My phone started to ring and I snatched it from the counter. Harry's name sat on the screen and I swiped open the call. "Harry? Oh my god!"

"Hey beautiful, how's it going?" His British accent was like music to my ears.

I shook my head In disbelief, the time zones should've made this call impossible. "Babe, what time is it?!"

"3:30am," he laughed and I nearly choked, "that doesn't matter though, I needed to call and wish you luck."

I blushed, this was exactly what I needed, just to hear from him. "You're amazing."

"Nah," he laughed. The telephone dragging out the husky tones in his voice. "That's you. You're going to kill it tonight, Taylor."

A knock at the door caught my attention. "You're on in five."

"Alright!" I called back and put the phone back to my ear. "I sure hope so, I'm so nervous they won't like this... That the fans won't approve of it." Harry chuckled as if that option was impossible. "Don't act like that, you know it's possible."

He laughed once again and I closed my eyes, picturing his smile, dimples embedded in the corner of his cheeks. "Just relax, you're gonna be fine, the fans will love it."

I took a deep breath. "Alright," I agreed. "Thank you for calling, Harry. I really needed this."

"I know." He whispered, laughing. "Alright well, I'm going to bed, I love you so much, and knock em dead, Kay?"

The smile grew on my face and I giggled. "Just for you. I love you too Harry and I'll call you tomorrow."
"Deal!"

With that, I hung up and placed the hat on top of my head. One last deep breath in the mirror and I left, running through backstage hallways, finding myself in the soundproof room with the rest of my band. I started running through a speech i had created in mind during the past twenty four hours. It was something I had done every tour for the past two tours and I wasn't dropping the tradition. "So just... Go out there, and do everything we've rehearsed. But this time... Interact with the audience every chance you have. Wink at the people in pit, grab their hands and dance with them, toss them guitar pics. They love it! Just.. Blow their mind!" I smiled at each and everyone of the people around me in the massive circle.

"We're gonna rock them!" Grant shouted, from across the circle.

"We're gonna sock em'" Amos laughed, chiming in on what grant just started.

"We're gonna knock them dead!" I laughed, hollering.

"TAYLOR SWIFT THIS TOUR IS RED!" Caitlin added.

"That's our chant," I stood with a smile on my face, "that's what we'll say before every show."

Paul raised his eyebrows, "what about the sparkle thing that Liz came up with, we've always used that."

"Exactly, we've always used that. This is a new tour, new singers, new dancers, there is no point for this tour in having the same chant. Liz isn't even here with us."

"Don't remind me." Caitlin grunted.

The circle went silent and I took a deep breath, changing the energy. "Alright everyone? On three! One... Two... Three..." We stuck our hands all in the middle of the huddle we had formed.

"ROCK EM', SOCK EM', KNOCK EM' DEAD, TAYLOR SWIFT THIS TOUR IS RED!!!"

We all rejoiced in laughter until someone called places and we rushed to starting positions.

I stood at the stop of the stair case behind the curtain, praying I wouldn't fall to my death. A voice whispered through the ear in my mic. "On three." And they counted down. My eyes scanned beneath me and the starting beats made my heart jump. The screams were outrageous and made chills crawl my spine.

I hope they like it.

I hope they love it.

I hope it's everything they expect.

I hope it's more than they expect.

I tapped my foot and the beat creeped in when I started to sing. A spotlight showed me through the curtain as I took a deep breath. "I'm walking fast through the traffic lights..."

The show went just how I wanted, if not better. The fans literally... Went all out with light up posters and costumes. They made me so unbelievably happy. After club red, I was on an adrenaline rush. I didn't get to bed until 3am, but hey, that's what happens with tour life. The next day was just like the last, a meet and greet before the show started, followed by an hour or so to get ready. My nerves had subsided, although the casual ones were still lingering. I tried calling Harry, thinking maybe the sound of his voice would cure me, but no answer.

I ventured to the side of stage this time, listening to Ed play his set. The fans really liked him, from what I could see they went insane! Singing along, and dancing, holding up signs that they had created just for him. Ed finished his set and dancers all piled out of pit to meet me backstage. We put in our hands and I gave another speech, ending with our new tag line. Two hours later with an enchanting finale; I made my way backstage and out of breath. "That was great!" People called, putting their hands together. I was engulfed in several hugs but someone just off stage, stood smiling at me. Simple little dimples in the corners of his cheeks. Sparkly eyes. Cheeky smile. But they didn't belong to just anyone...

Whoever's arm I was being held in, I darted from. "Harry, oh my god!" within moments, his strong arms wrapped themselves around me and squeezed. I breathed into his neck. I wasn't expecting this, not in the slightest.

"You were amazing!" Harry mumbled into my red, sparkly ring master jacket.

"I can't believe you're here." I choked, readjusting myself in his arms, so I was looking at him.

Harry's smile grew as he stared into my eyes intensely. "I missed you." He whispered, leaning his lips into mine and the room ran silent.

I was speechless and had nothing left to say. How he managed this, I had no idea. But he did, for me.

Paula interrupted our moment with a clearing of her throat. "Sorry to barge in on the reunion, but Taylor you have a meet and greet in twenty minutes." She said with a smile.

I looked from Harry to Paula. "But... Can't we cancel it? Say I'm sick or something. Please Paula!" I didn't ever cancel meet and greets but this seemed like a good explanation.

She shook her head, "it won't take long!"

"It's okay," Harry kissed my forehead and smiled. "Lets go get you changed and I'll wait in the dressing room. You've never canceled a meet and greet and I don't want to be the reason you have to."

I smiled up at him, pulling his hands from my hips and lacing our fingers together. Quickly stopping at my dressing room, I stripped from my sparkly attire and into something more... Appropriate. A black dress with lace sleeves to the wrist. Unwillingly, I headed to Club Red for the second time this tour. Harry presented me with a quick but passionate kiss before leaving me to attend to the fans. The smile that danced across my lips was partially realistic. Don't get me wrong, I loved the fans, but I just really wanted to be with Harry. These fans did go all out, though, and they deserved to see me smile. After all, if it weren't for them, I wouldn't even being doing what I was. After a good hour I rushed back to the dressing room to see my love.

When I arrived back in the room, Harry was resting on the couch. My purse as his pillow and his knees pulled up. I smiled as I walked up to the couch, kneeling down. He was so cute like this. Well, he was always cute, but especially now. He was adorable. "Harry..." I whispered, pushing my hands through his curls. When he didn't stir, I placed my lips against his, my fingers trailing down his neck.

Harry opened his eyes, his lips pulling at mine within the kiss. "I've missed that." He mumbled with his raspy morning voice.

I smiled and blushed as he sat up. Harry tapped his lap and I pulled myself up into his arms. I pushed my forehead down against his as his arms creeped around me. "I never thought I could love someone as much as I love you." He insisted.

I took a deep breath, his cologne filling me entirely. Slowly, my lips meeting his, I became completely captivated.
It seemed like every time I saw him, I fell more in love. Like I fell in love again each time he kissed me. He made me feel special and loved in ways no one had ever done. A knock at the door interrupted my thoughts. I turned to see Paula, a smile spread across her face. "We've got to get going little love birds." She teased

I ignored her and she wondered off. Harry pulled my attention by his lips falling on mine. But the romantic moment was cut short by Harry asking if we could get something to eat. "I don't know just something greasy. And American."

"Harry, all that is in that stuff is fat."

"And?"

I rolled my eyes. "It's late, all that fat will just goto your hips or thighs."

He chuckled, a smirk shortly following. "Not if we work it off." He winks.

I took a deep breath and rolled my eyes. "I vote movie and popcorn."

"And twizzlers and m&ms." I glared. "And nachos!"

"Harry. It's all junk!"

He sighed, "fine! No nachos or m&ms but I want twizzlers. Oh! And the popcorn has to have butter and salt."
I stared into his eyes and gave in to him. "Fine." I sighed, "it's just so bad for-"

"Why do you always say this kinda stuff? Like you do a three hour workout every night on stage the last thing you need is to worry about your weight. Plus, you're perfect. I love you just the way you are."

Harry was so cute when he went on little spills like that. Where he told me I was beautiful and flawless and perfect and how he loved me the way I was. And that he didn't want me to change. I loved it when he did that, but it was bitter sweet. Like, he didn't understand the stuff that I had gone through when I was younger and even though he's had me explain it more than once, he didn't get it. After long conversations I always ended in tears. He didn't understand that I didn't love myself. He didn't understand why I always was watching my weight. He didn't understand why I wouldn't eat certain foods and he didn't understand why sometimes I wouldn't eat all. He didn't understand my nights in the bathroom. He just... Didn't.

Usually when I was around Harry I tried to subside the urge. And I would eat what he wanted. But tour time was a whole new thing. I had to look perfect. And that roll of fat that sat, pushed up on the edge of my shorts was nothing but a figure of disgust.

•••

Harry and I lay on my bed in the back of the tour bus. This one I shared with the girls. Caitlin, Elle, Kamilah, Melanie and Clare. The odd time the boys would shift back and forth, like Grant, who often got stuck with us. The tv in the corner was playing a movie I had seen a thousand and one times, (Country Strong) while Harry and I intertwined our bodies, a quilted blanket lying lightly overtop. The bus was somewhere down highway 29 on our way to St. Louis and for the most part, it was silent. The girls had called it early. Newbies, not used to the road. My sliding door was closed and the only light was from the tv and the small twinkling stars shining from the small sky window.

My focas drifted from the movie and straight to the sky. Maybe Kelly Canter was right. Maybe... Fame was too much. Or the whole 'you can't have love and fame at the same time' thing. Stars were so much more... Peaceful. They did look like a good resting spot. "Babe," my thoughts repelled again and I turned my attention to the boy who had been kissing my neck. And by the numbness lingering at my collarbone I was guessing it had been a while.

"Oh, sorry." I mumbled, readjusting myself and grasping his hand, squeezing. Our lips touched but only gently.

"What are you thinking about?" He whispered, bringing his lips to my ear, nearly nibbling.

"Oh nothing." I sighed, "I'm just happy you're here." Saying this, I cuddled even closer. "What are you thinking about?" I turned the question around.

"You..." His voice was warm and it made butterflies grow in my stomach. Harry pressed his lips against my skin and I knew his exact intentions.

"Babe, we're on a tour bus." But apparently it didn't stop him. My lips parted to let out a soft moan, the feeling of his lips against my skin was as soft of silk. "Harry, we can't do this here." Sex on the bus was not something that i was excited about doing again. After the last time on the boys' bus, a few months ago, they still bring it up. Harass me with it... in a cute, fun way... I think. Non the less, embarrassing.

"Oh come on. I've been waiting over two weeks and I don't wanna wait another moment." Is what I made from the mumbles that were being made into my neck.

"Harry, what if the girls hear." I backed away and propped myself up. "Like awkward or what." His eyebrows fell and his lips turned downward. Harry's hand found mine under the blankets. "We can't."

Harry rolled his eyes. I was weak for him, don't get me wrong. The way he was looking at me. The sound in his voice. His touch. But a creaky tour bus was not the place to get it on. "I can be quiet. I promise." He whispered and winked, his hand lead me closer.

"H-Harry," I stuttered right before my lips fell into his. Harry always had that way of changing my mind. Captivating me completely and changing every thought in my mind, one thing to a polar opposite. I loved him so much but this wasn't something I needed right now. I had to make a good impression on my band mates and this was not the way.

Harry flipped us around and pinned me down against the bed. His lips pushing down on mine forcefully. At first I didn't act upon his actions. I knew it would make him a little less uninterested, but it didn't work. The way his lips fit with mine was my undoing. I just didn't have enough will power. "Okay okay." I whispered between the kiss that I began to play on. "We just have to be quiet."
Harry laughs as his lips engulf mine. Winning complete dominance. My fingers are deepening themselves into his broad shoulders. He smells of his regular cologne, the name escapes me, and a soft hint of the beer he had taken earlier. Each article of clothing is slowly brought from our bodies until all that covers us is each other and the comforter. His warmth comforts me... Scratch that.
He comforts me.