Always

Chapter 82

A week later, I suddenly found myself sprinting over to Harry’s house one afternoon, an envelope clutched in my hand as the breeze blew past my face.  My heart pounded nervously in my chest, my entire future with Harry hinging on the contents of the papers I held in my hand.  As soon as I reached his front door, I threw it open and let myself inside.

“Harry!” I called into the house, ducking my head in the kitchen quickly to find it empty before I saw him appear at the top of the stairs.

“What’s wrong?” he asked urgently, catching on to the frantic tone of my voice.  I didn’t say anything as I held the letter up, my eyes widening in anxiety as he connected the dots and realized what I had. 

“Have you opened it?” he asked, struggling to keep his voice calm.  I shook my head quickly, too nervous to speak.  I could hardly bear to think what I would do if I hadn’t gotten in and had to go somewhere other than Harry…

I wouldn’t be able to handle it, I knew that without a doubt in my mind.  My eyes never left his face as he bounded down the stairs and came to stand in front of me.  His hands wrapped around my cheeks as he bent down to kiss me once, my lips hardly able to respond as I tried to control the pounding in my chest. 

“Will you open it with me?” I asked shakily, my eyes flitting back and forth between his. 

“Of course,” he said, nodding as his thumbs stroked my cheeks.  “Let’s go upstairs.”

I nodded, copying his subtle reassuring nod as he turned to lead me to his room.  My body felt numb as I sat down on the edge of his bed, my posture stiff and upright as I watched him pull his desk chair to sit directly across from me.  My eyes followed his hands as they closed around mine, the letter still clutched between them.  His thumbs ran soothingly across my knuckles as he spoke.

“Joey,” he said calmly.  “I know you’re nervous, but it will all be okay, alright?”

My knees bounced under our hands as I continued to watch the trail his thumbs ran across my skin, unable to answer him for fear of choking on my words. 

“Joey, babe,” he said gently, lifting one of his hands to tilt my chin up, forcing me to look at him.  My eyes slowly trailed up his torso, his chest, his neck, and his lips before finally meeting his gaze.  He was watching me very closely, his eyes taking in every detail of my expression as he tried his best to calm me down and reassure me.

“Whatever happens with this letter, good or bad, we will get though it,” he said slowly, enunciating every word so I would absorb them.  “Do you hear me?”

I took a shaky breath and nodded slowly.  His hand that was still twisted in mine squeezed tightly while his other slid up to cup my cheek, his touch calming me down a little.  He gave me a small smile and took a deep breath, nodding at me to join him.  I followed his actions, sucking in a deep inhale that burned a bit on the way through my lungs, but it did make me feel better.

“I love you, Joey.  Everything will work out, no matter what, because there isn’t anything I wouldn’t do to be with you, do you understand?”

I nodded, his words stilling the slight tremor that had settled into my hands.  “I love you, Harry.”

“I love you so much, and none of this will matter in a minute because I know you got in,” he said, smiling softly at me. 

“Okay,” I said, unable to think of anything else.

“Open it,” he urged gently, nudging my hand softly with his.  My hands started to shake again as I moved to slide my fingers under the flap and I fumbled with the paper.  Harry ducked his head to kiss the back of my hand gently, holding his lips there until I stopped shaking again.