Bad Habits z.m. (BWWM)

Chapter 3

"So what did you need?" I ask innocently as I walk behind him into his office.

"I would like to share some information with you." He says looking at me distantly.

"Don't I feel special. What is it?" I ask walking to his desk and sitting on his chair. "This is lowkey comfortable." I mumble leaning back in his chair. He clears his throat annoyed and I mouth a weak sorry.

"I shouldn't be telling you this but its about this week's try-outs."

"Mhm." I urge him on looking under his desk.

 My foot knocked something over and I bent down to pick it up but was beyond surprised. Mostly shocked. There were bags of junk food. Hot Cheetos, Gummy Worms, Takis, Grandma Cookies, Fudge Brownies, Skittles, Starbursts. My eyes searched around in excitement. The nearest convenience store is almost an hour away. But if us trainees get caught with any of this heavenly goodness, we're toast. I guess he must have privileges.

"Cookie, you listening?" He asks hesitantly.

"I'm not gonna lie, no." I respond picking up the opened bag Gummy Worms and stuffing a handful in my mouth.

"You shouldn't be eating that." He smiles. A genuine smile, its cute on him.

"You should smile more often." I whisper smiling softly. His eyes meet mine for a few glorious seconds then he tears them away leaving us in awkward silence. My compliment made him oddly uncomfortable.

"Well, I was saying that you guys have already made it. The training was only for ranking. I was thinking of putting you at number one. You've trained hard to become a Captain. This is not out of favoritism, but because I see that you're capable." He hesitates for a moment. "I believe in you Cookie." He says. 

This all isn't making sense. He's supposed to hate me. I liked it when he hated me. All of my 'friends' here hated me before they were my friends. I want him to hate me, then i'll know that he doesn't want something from me.

"Don't. You might be making the worst decision in your life. We both know that i'm capable but will I do the job? After all, I don't want to become some puny, unreliable, lazy captain like you." I shrug. I can the see the pain and anger mixing together on his face slowly. 

He looks at me, disgusted and crooked, and shakes his head, I feel my stomach churn. It's for the best. I think to myself.

"Unbelievable. I reward you humbly and try to give you what you deserve. This is what I get?" He says, his eyes closed. His hands are clenched so tight that his knuckles begin to turn white. His chest heaves as he breaths in and out. Fear slowly crawls up my throat but I hold it in, trying not to let it overcome me.

"I don't deserve this. You're only doing this out of pity." I respond firmly.

"Pity?" He spits out looking at me. "Would pity stop each and every Officer in this facility from trying take your innocence, would pity stop Blake from sabotaging each one of your training days, would pity let you talk to me like I'm child and not your Captain!" He yells angrily. "You wanna see pity? Get out!" He points to the door, hovering over me with a harsh look.

I stare at him not knowing how to respond. I don't know whether to cry, retaliate, or just walk away like this never happened. But my body takes control before I can rationalize what I'm doing.

"Thank you." I speak through the quietness. My arms are wrapped around him tightly. His heaving breaths even out. He sets his arms on my back gently. I back away and look at him in his eyes.

"Thank you." I tell him, louder and firmer.

"It's nothing." He says looking away from me.

"It is something." I turn grab his hand. "Its our first sign of friendship." I smile. He looks back at me with a crooked smile. His perfect white teeth glistening.