Hainan Dao

Book III Chapter 01

HAINAN DAO BOOK III

CHAPTER 01

I felt like I could topple over any minute, it was so hot. How did anyone ever keep dry in this climate? I took my handkerchief out of my pocket and wiped it across my brow. I had forgotten to bring my water bottle with me. That figured. It seemed to me that I was getting more and more forgetful these days.

I stopped beside a tree to recover a little under the shade of its leaves. Leaning my arm on it, I took a big breath in and out but slowly. I waved to Biai, who was already a good distance ahead of me, asking her to slow down. Disappointed and unbelieving of my frailty, she slumped her shoulders, plodded back to my side and yanking on my sleeve, urged me on again while she gibbered at me like a chipmunk with a hurt ego.

“All right, all right!” I shook my head as I picked up the pace again. “What was it you wanted to show me anyway?”

She looked over her shoulder and motioned for me to keep up.

It was now about two weeks after the dinner with the mayor. Over this time, I had learned to live mostly out of my room. I didn’t go anywhere. I didn’t see anyone. No one important anyway. There were only two people that I would willingly see now, and one of them was Biai. She was the only one that I ever went anywhere with and the only one I would let into my room. And that was only because I knew we wouldn’t be talking very much. Well, sometimes we did. Actually, sometimes, I would sit on the edge of my bed and talk at her, while she was fooling around with my watch, or Nike running shoes, or some other gadget she had never seen before. It was strange. To be honest, I think I would have gone completely bananas if she hadn’t been there for me to talk at, and I don’t even know whether this was a compliment or an insult to psychotherapists in general.

The second person that I was willing to see now and again was my brother, Fuhwa. On several occasions, he had felt strong enough, and so had summoned me to his chambers and we talked. The very first time I was there, he asked me how I was enjoying my stay in Hainan. I told him that he should be far more concerned about his condition than whether or not I was having fun on the Island. Then we discussed his disease, what he had tried and was now trying for treatment and how well they were working on his joints. I thought about my old professor’s study, still going on back in Toronto, and I asked him if he was up to going to Canada for a little visit.

He had shaken his head. He said no and didn’t give me a reason.

One time, during one of our talks, two men from the village came in and asked him to settle a dispute between them that had arisen over property lines. After listening to their arguments, Fuhwa turned to me and asked me what I thought. I told him that I thought he should try to get some rest and get someone else to decide.

He had sighed. “Furen, my little brother…” He coughed. “…the need of the people is great…far greater than those of myself. Can you not see that?”

Sure. I saw it. I saw it all right.

With the incense rising slowly into the air, and an old woman stirring a bowl of some herbal concoction in the corner, I saw the needs of the two men, rough and rugged from their toiling in the fields, and then I saw my brother, a humbled, broken porcelain doll, coughing beneath his quilted covers but making no noise.

The needs of the people. Sure. Everybody needed something.

The two men had left without an answer.

Everybody needed something. Just like me.

Well, that’s all right. I didn’t expect anyone to understand. After all, how could he have understood? How could he know what it was like? What I felt…?