Chapter One
OMG, im through, they put me through, OMG.
Nothing can beat this feeling. Im so close to what i want, what i need, and now she is the only one who stands in my way.
Im Kimberley Walsh, im 24 years old, and all my life i've wanted to sing, or be on stage, or just something that involves the limelight, its me, its who i am, and finally today, i've been put through to the last 6 girls, on the biggest talent show in the UK, The X Factor. To be honest i didn't think i'd make it, I got 4 yes's on the first auditions, and i even got Cheryl in tears, not that thats a good thing, but she is gorgeous, every guy wants to be with her right? And every girl wants to be her, and thats me, i want to be her, want to have what she has, the lifestyle, the band, the money, isn't that what dreams are made of? But when it came to the bootcamp stages, there was something Simon didn't like about me, he didn't want me through i know that, but Cheryl along with Louis and Danni really fighted my corner, it was actually quite humbling to see the Nations Sweet-Heart Cheryl Cole, rooting for me, arguing with Simon for me, beliveing in me. She will be my mentor, and i will not let her down.
Chapter Two
My bags were packed, my small flat locked, and I was safely in the car to the airport. We weren't told where we were going, but just what climate to pack for, I was very pleased when my group were told that our destiniation was somewhere hot, so it was advised to pack our bikini's, which i have no objections to. But I do know, this isn't a holiday, this is to get my dream, and god damn I am going to get it. I've always been like this, fiercely independant, I've had relationships here and there, but to be honest every guy i've been with has just held me back, I don't need in that in my life, so I've happily adapted to being on my own for some months now, I don't need anyone, and lets face it, most people are pretty fake anyway, which is why I'm actually looking foward to having a proper conversation with a certain Cheryl Cole. Is she really what they say she is? Lovely, sweet and caring? Or is it just an act? Aswell as getting to the live-shows, i will be finding out as much about Cheryl Cole as i can.
"Wow" Were my only words on looking upon the magnificent, gigantic house, that was to be our home for the next week. We had landed in Nice, France, and the weather was scorching. This really was what dreams were made of, I could get used to this, and if i had my way, at the end of the year, I will be getting used to this.
The day passed quickly, and i busied myself with working out what i was going to be singing to Cheryl & her assistant judge, Nadine Coyle, that leggy one from Girls Aloud. I wasn't really nervous about singing, i knew i could do it, i just had to prove to Cheryl i was what she needed in this competition, I could be her answer to everything.
Chapter Three
It was the night before I had to give my performance to Cheryl, it was weird, i never got nervous, but there was something niggling in the back of my mind. I had never even had a proper chat with Cheryl and now i had to sing in front of her and let her make this descion about my life, like she was my 'god' for the day. My mind was swimming and I needed some air, it was late and I was sure everyone would be in bed. Which I was pleased about, I wasn't in the mood tyo be socialising, i just wanted and needed 'me' time. With that I quietly made my way out of the house, into the pool and garden area, still in my short shorts and vest top. I made my way over to the pool, it was so still and silent outside still warm yet refreshing and cool. It was deadly silent, well it was until I heard something. At first I thought it was an animal, but no.. It was a whimpering, a woman, a woman definatly crying. "Great" I thought, some emotional contestant who I have to cheer up, even though I am competing against her. I decided to have a look around try and see who it was, I didn't have to look much further, out of the dark came a petite frame, her long flowing brunette hair falling below her shoulders, her big brown eyes brimming with tears, it was my mentor, Cheryl.
*****
I didn't know what to do, I didn't want to scare her, make her feel uncomfortable, but there was something about her that i couldn't just leave in that state, she looked so helpless, so vunerable, like she needed someone, anyone.
"Cheryl" I whispered into the darkness,
She stopped in her tracks, she looked at me knowing it was to late to turn away and run, and in a way i didn't want her to run. I wanted her to open up to me, for the first time in my life I wanted to help someone, without no gain for myself. As she had still not said anything, i walked up to her, and my first reaction was to wrap my arms around her tightly, she didn't back away or stiffen up, she let her whole body weight against mine, and started crying even harder, harder then I have seen anyone cry before. I don't know what had happenend tonight, but I knew it was something bad, something that might change my life forever.
Chapter Four
We both stood there in our embrace for what seemed like hours, she clearly needed some contact, and at the moment I was the best she had for it. When she finally pulled away, she looked at me with those huge brown eyes, which were red and blotchy now, with thick black mascara smeared around them, not a pretty sight you might feel, but in a way I didn't care, to be honest I don't know if I had ever seen something so beautiful.
"You must think im pathetic, having all this,' she wavered her hand around, ' and yet being so miserable i've had to cry on on someone im meant to be looking after meself,' she smiled the saddest smile i had ever seen. " It's just things are really hard at the moment, getting on top of me."
I took a breath whilst trying to figure out what to say, somehow I didn't think anything I could do or say would make a blind bit of difference, " Babe, I don't think your pathetic atall, we all get down at some point, even if we are mentors!" She smiled weakly at my comment, " Why don't we go and sit down by the pool, you look like you need a chat?"
She nodded silently, I gently took her hand and guided her over by the pool, sitting down i let my feel drop in to the cool water, and she doing the same, even though it was making her dress wet. We sat there in a comfortable silence for a bit, I didn't want to pressure her into talking, so I let her gather her thoughts instead, atleast she knew someone was here if she needed to talk.
"Things at home aren't great at the moment,' she said suddenly, waking me from my thoughts, " I mean everyone thinks me and Ash have the perfect lifestyle, that im over what happenend last year with him and that *Not Allowed*, but it's not just what what he did last year, It's what he's doing now, right now probably," She said quietly before the tears started streaming out of her eyes again. All I could do whats pull her into another hug, her face buried under my neck, my chin resting on her head, and my hand gently rubbing her back, " Its just like i'm not good enough for him no more, I should get up leave, walk away, I do know that, but there is something keeping me, and I don't know what it is, I'm just scared of lonley I guess" she sighed before saying " Jesus.... I really am pathetic."
" Babe please stop saying that, you are my no means pathetic. No-one can be pathetic and manage to get into the biggest girl band in britain, no one who is pathetic can get to be a respected judge on a top T.V show, no one pathetic can win against Simon Cowell in a fight!" She started laughing, a sound that made me feel good, " Look babe, I can't really tell you much, I don't know you, you don't know me, I'm a complete no body and the closest I get to your life if through reading magazines, which probably ain't true anyways, but you are a great, strong girl, who shouldn't be scared of lonely, It's people like you who will always have people around them, and I guess if your really desperate you can always call me," I grinned with a cheeky wink, " Now lets get you back up to your bed, I want you to be on full alert for when you hear me tomorow," I teased.
I reached out for her hand again, to pull her up which she greatfully recieved. I told her I would drop her off at her room, so she began to guide me through the many doors and hallways of the house. Finally we were staring at her room's door, which i noted was only just above mine on a different floor. We hugged once more, and she gave me a peck on the cheek, " Thank you Kimberley, I don't know if you know how much you have helped me tonight," With that she smiled, and turned to go into her room, I returning the smile gave a quick nod of acknowledgement, sometimes words just weren't needed. Her door closed, and I made my way down the stairs to my room, feeling something I had never really felt before.
