ego ~ h.s. [editing]

twenty five ~ the open door

Harry's POV

It had been a while since I last came home visiting Mum and Gemma.

I parked my car and walked to my old home's door. Dressed up in a white button up shirt and slim, black trousers, I felt a little bit cold in the fresh autumn air. When Gemma opened the door, she greeted me with a huge smile and hugged me. Mum also kissed two sides if my cheeks and almost started crying again. She gets so emotional when she sees me. After that I greeted Liam and when I knew there was nobody else to greet, I rushed to the already well-laid table.

"Somebody's hungry, huh?", Gemma raised a brow as I looked at the diner.

I nodded and she shook her head at me when I sat down, followed by all the others.

After half an hour, I was so full that I couldn't even move. I just sat there and praised my mum's cooking skills. When the door rang unexpectedly, I said that I'd get this.

When I opened the door, the blonde standing in front of me literally threw herself into my arms. I couldn't do anything but stay the position I was in.

"Harry, I missed you so much!", she squealed as I forced myself to hug her back.

What was she doing here? Who did invite her?

My confusion was obviously written all over my face that she took my hand and said, "Harry, we need to talk."

I was just about to ask what the fuck we had to talk about when my mum walked into us.

"Harry, your meal gets-"

"We'll be there in a second, mum.", I spoke, holding the beautiful blonde's gaze.

After hearing mother's footsteps back to the dining room, I gesture the girl to follow me upstairs.

It takes me a second to decide which room we should go in. Finally I decided that we'd have our talk in the guest room as known as my old room. I open the door and turn the light on.

"Now tell me, May, what you wanted to."

I watch her as she slides her coat off and sits down on my bed.

"Harry.. I don't know how to say this.. but I kind of missed you while you were away."

I almost smile at her words. Missing me? Why would she miss me? Stupid.

"May..", I start but she stands up and walks towards me. I stand near to the window and she positions herself just in front of me. She's not tall, not at all.

"Harry, since that night.. You haunt me in my dreams. I miss you and every time I see you on TV or in a magazine I almost start to cry. I want to have back what we had.."

I look away because I can't face her. It's just so damn difficult to look someone in the eye that has feelings towards you. Feelings you can't have for them. I open my mouth to say something but I can't bring myself to say anything.

"Sssssh...", May whispers as she steps closer and puts a finger on my lips. "Remember the night, Harry. That was our night Harry..", she traces lines on my chin and leans closer. No, if she kisses me now, I'll lose it. I literally will.

May's mouth is now just beneath my ears. "Remember what you did for me and what I did for you.. Hour for hour.. In secret.. like now.."

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

She's too damn hot and I'm too damn eager. The last time we did this I was drunk and it hadn't been right but now it seems like my only option.

"Fuck it.", I mumble under my breath as I lift her up and place her on the window bench as she starts to kiss me heatedly.

May knows how this works but no, I think, as she tries to rip my shirt apart to touch my skin. I need this shirt since I will be back downstairs when this is finished.

The thought that my family is downstairs while we are having a hot make out session here is pretty dangerous and I can't lie.. I love it.

Eventually my shirt lies on the ground and May doesn't hesitate to touch every single spot on my skin. We break the kiss just for a millisecond when May gets rid of her shirt and when I'm about to unclasp her bra, I stop.

"Harry... don't stop.. not now..", May begs between moans and groans and pushes herself more to me.

"Fucking on the window bench is not my thing, when anyone out there can see us.", I almost spit at her stupid being. "The bed.", I command as she rushes over to the small bed.

When I'm about to let down the shutters, I notice that the lights of the opposite house are off. All lights except the ones in the right opposite room.

I narrow my eyes in hope to see better in the dark. I swear it's like I have seen someone out there. That room.. I look away and look there again.

And then I see it. I see her.

Wide eyes, bulging. Her mouth trembles as her eyes start to water. She covers her mouth with her hand and my heart shatters into thousands of pieces.

"Harry, come on, I need you.. I'm getting cold."

"May, shut the fuck up, get up, clothes on and you go. You leave and never come back here or where I am again. I don't love you, I never did. I was drunk when I slept with you and you sure as hell are hot and the sex was good, but my heart is already taken."

I didn't dare to look her in the eyes as I heard her sobs. She didn't say anything either. She just put on her shirt and coat and before she left, I thought she'd smack me like Dawn had when I called her a bitch. Instead, she surprised me when she said, "When we spent the night together, you talked in your sleep. You didn't say any names but you always begged for one more chance. You said that your life without 'her' was in black and white and she was the only person that was in colour. I knew then that you loved someone but I didn't want it to be true. I just hope you don't screw her and her feelings."

With that, she left. And me? I didn't waste any second to shrug my shirt on. I can't remember me running this fast in the past. On the other hand, this is a matter of life and death. I ran down the stairs, opened the door, not bothering to close it though and ran to the Foster's. I rang the bell for what it felt like 1000 times but Dawn didn't answer.

Of course she wouldn't.

I have never been so desperate in my life. I ran my fingers through my hair and sighed. She won't open the door? Fine. We will do this the old school way.

I picked some pebbles and walked around the corner, when I reached Dawn's window I threw the pebbles so that they'd softly hit the glass.

"WHAT THE FUCK?!", Dawn screamed as she stuck her head out of the window. She didn't say a thing, she just looked at me without emotion and this hurt me incredibly.

"Open the door, please."

She looked at me for a few more seconds and then shook her head before closing the window. Then she disappeared in her room and I felt so exhausted for a moment. Why was she being so complicated?

Because she saw how you almost fucked May, an old friend of hers and yours., my mind reminds me and I feel so dumb.

"Dawn, if you don't want to talk it's okay. But just listen. Listen what I have to say to you. Please let me in, I'm freezing my balls off."

I so hoped that she'd react to my plea but a long time nothing happened. She just couldn't forgive me, could she?

After like ten minutes I had lost every piece of hope that I had built. Having my shoulders down, I started to walk towards our house as I heard a lock. I turned around immediately and saw an open door. The door to my only chance to get everything straight.