You Belong to Me (Stevens Book 6)

Chapter 18

Alice didn't remember how she got home.  She had sent a text along the way to Gabe, saying that she had a headache and that she would call him tomorrow, asking him to please let the others know, then she climbed the bed and cried.  She didn't know how long she was there, and eventually there was a knock at her door, but she ignored it. She heard the door open and close, and then Grace stood in the doorway.  She had forgotten she had given Grace a key.

Grace looked at her for a moment, not saying a word, then she left and came back with a mug of tea, setting on the bedside table next to her.

"Drink this."

Alice took it and sipped in between dry racking sobs. She had no more tears left to cry.

"When neither you nor Rainer showed up at the restaurant, and then you texted Gabe we all thought..." Grace shrugged. "Then Rainer showed up at our place well on his way to being drunk, and I knew that it had gone terribly wrong."

"I hurt him Grace. I hurt him worse than Yvonne ever did."

Grace didn't ask any questions, but helped her change and get into bed, promising to come by and check on her later.

*******

When Grace walked back into the apartment it was to see Bryce with a grim expression while Rainer looked into the bottom of a glass like it held all the answers, and she simply couldn't take it anymore.

"You really are a bastard, do you know that Rainer?" She threw her keys down, ignoring the stunned expression on both her husband's and Rainer's face.

"I have tried to keep my thoughts on this matter to myself, but I can't anymore." She knelt in front of Rainer looking into his eyes, seeing his pain.

"She is not Yvonne." Rainer jumped at the name not expecting it. "She is not Yvonne," Grace stressed again. "I didn't know Yvonne well, but I know Alice, and I know that she has more love for you in her big toe than Yvonne had in her whole miserable little heart."

She stood up and met Bryce's questioning glance, ignoring it.

"Alice has put up with your 'just friends' bullshit to stay in your life because she knew that if she didn't agree to it that you would have walked away and not looked back, and she couldn't have handled that, but you're the one who keeps breaking your own rules.  Do you know what she is doing right now?  She has cried so much that there are no more tears, just dry racking sobs, and do you know why she is crying?"

Rainer wouldn't even look at Grace.

"Do you?" Grace demanded an answer, getting right up in Rainer's face. When he looked at her with eyes devoid of any feeling Grace realized she was quickly losing her chance, so she hit as hard as she could. "Because she is worried that she said something that is unforgivable and hurt you, and the fact that she hurt you is ripping out what it left of her heart."

Grace stood up and walked over to the bar, grabbing a bottle.

"Here, you might as well drink it all, but remember when you sober up it will all still be there, and sweet honest little Alice will still be broken because you're the only one that can put her back together. The only thing is that you need to figure out how to put yourself back together first."

Grace stormed out of the room, slamming the door and leaving a heavy silence behind her.

Rainer took another gulp of his drink, refusing to acknowledge that he had heard Grace.

" Did you know that she figured it all out?" He finally spoke.

"What?" Bryce encouraged, moving to sit across from Rainer.

"Everything, Steven Douglas, Yvonne, me...."

"She knows about Steven Douglas?" Bryce leaned forward. This went even deeper than he had realized.

"She knows all of my secrets. That's why she found me.  She was writing her dissertation on Steven Douglas, and knew that I was the only one who had ever interviewed him, so she was hoping I would contact him on her behalf." He smiled at the memory of how she had looked the first time she had opened her eyes and looked at him, so trusting and vulnerable. Rainer hurled the glass across the room as if he was throwing it at the memory.

He took a deep breath before he continued.

"I promised her my notes.  She had said that she was counting on the interview for income, so I gave her a job, she told me about her wounded heart, so I tried to fix that. I tried to fix it all, but instead I just damaged her more. I'm in love with her in here," he pointed to his chest, "but I don't know how to love her here." He looked at Bryce pointing to his head. "Does that make sense?"

"Yes."

Rainer stood up and walked to the balcony doors. The thought of Alice sobbing, the thought that she hated him; he had played a game he didn't even know he was playing. He wanted all of her but he didn't want her to have any of him. The real crime was that she had all of him and he hadn't realized it until he had seen her with another man.  Did he really expect that no one would see the wonder that was Alice and not try to claim her?

His phone rang and he answered it automatically.

Bryce was silent as he listened to Rainer reply in single syllables.

"I have to go." He reached down for his travel bag. "I'm sorry about the glass."

Bryce recognized that he had moved into work mode, compartmentalizing the situation with Alice until he felt it would be a good time to take it out again and analysis it.

"One word of advice brother, time is your enemy here.  The longer you take the deeper the wound, and the harder it is to heal."

Rainer nodded then started to dial a number on his phone.

"I'll be in touch," he said as he walked out the door.