Empathy | Jikook

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Everyone assumes being able to tell how everyone feels, to feel everything with them is great. I can always tell when people are lying, so I'm never fooled. This should be a good thing, right. Oh how wrong that statement is...
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BEEP! BEEP! BEEP!
I woke up to the sound of my alarm and slowly sat up, rubbing the sleep out of my eyes. I yawned and rolled off the bed, too lazy to stand up for a few minutes. Eventually i got bored of laying on the floor and got up to get ready for work at the cafe across town.

Everyday is the same for me. Wake up, go to work, try not to break under the weight of everyone's emotions, go home and pass out. I'm always tired because feeling everything can really take a toll on you. I deal with though, by sleeping twelve hours a night...

After i got dressed and freshened up in the bathroom i went downstairs to the kitchen for breakfast. I never eat anything fancy in the morning, usually toast or cereal. Today i decided to make toast, to once again, eat by myself.

It's been really lonely here ever since my mother died. She was the only family i had and the only person i was really close to. I don't really have friends because it's hard to deal with people all the time. Always having to give them attention and not ignore them for days at a time because 'human interaction just takes too much energy.'

I ate my breakfast in complete silence and washed my dishes before going to work. I grabbed my keys and slipped on my shoes before walking out of my house to my car.

The drive to work was quiet. I didn't turn on the radio so the only sounds were my breathing and the engine of my car. The drive took less than ten minutes and i sighed as i pulled into the parking lot, knowing the peaceful part of my day would soon come to an end.

I walked inside to be greeted by my boss Seokjin hyung, "good morning Jimin." I don't like being rude so replied with a polite "good morning hyung." Seokjin smiled at me, which i returned, and told my job for the day. "I want you to work the register today while Taehyung is out sick." "No problem boss, i hope he gets better soon."

In reality, working the register was a problem, but I wasn't going to tell him that. Working the register means i have a lot of human interaction, much more than my usual job of cleaning the tables after people leave. I went into the back to put on my apron and put my person items in my locker.

Seokjin hyung opened the small cafe a few minutes after i came back out. Not long after, people started coming in wanting breakfast or coffee before work or school. I took peoples orders and tried my hardest not to look into their eyes too much without being rude.

Even with all my efforts i still managed to have my mood change twenty times by noon. I stayed behind the register for two more hours, getting tireder and tireder the more i had to look at people.

Finally, it was time for my break so i went to the back and just sat there staring at nothing in particular, thinking about nothing in particular for ten minutes. It seems like a weird thing to do, but it's the most calming thing ever. You don't have to feel when you simply exist. I always have a little more energy after doing that, so i returned to work a little more upbeat than before.

The day went on the same as before until ten minutes before my shift ended. A boy who seemed to be a couple years younger than me walked in to order something. He had raven black hair and a tired look on his face. Even though his eyes were droopy and half closed, he still managed to look beautiful. His eyes held secrets that i wanted to know, all i had to do was look.

He was different, different from the people i normally deal with. He just seemed so much more interesting. He slowly approached the counter and lazily looked over the menu. "Can i have a caramel macchiato, please?" "Sure, that'll be three dollars."

I tried to get him to look at me as i took his money so i could see the secrets hidden in his beautiful eyes, but it didn't work. I gave him his change and told him to wait at the other end of the counter for his drink. I brought the sweet drink to him and he finally looked me in the eyes as i handed it to him.

But i couldn't see anything but my own reflection. I felt nothing coming from him, nothing at all. It was as if he felt nothing at all...

The boy left right after i gave him his drink and i just stood there staring into space for the remainder of my shift. After my shift i went into the back to take off my apron and gather my things so i could go home. I bid Seokjin hyung goodbye and walked out to my car.

The strange boy with with raven hair never left my mind the whole drive home. Why couldn't i read him? Why did i feel nothing when i looked into his eyes? Does he just not feel anything or is he the one person I can't read like an open book? Will i ever see him again? These thoughts and many others raced through my mind for the rest of the day.

When i got home i made ramen to eat for dinner and ate it quietly, staring at the wall in front of me, trying so hard not to think about the boy from earlier. Once i finished eating, i washed up and got ready for bed. For the first time ever i fell asleep with something on my mind... the tired looking boy i just couldn't seem to read.