Katherine waits for Guy to enter the room and then closes the door behind him.
‘I never want anybody else to know this, Guy, it would kill me. The shame. Please, just let me talk,’ she says, shakily. ‘Don't say anything. Don't say anything until I have finished.’
Guy nods.
Katherine goes to sit on the bed, but changes her mind and instead sits on the floor, hugging her knees. She stares at a point ahead of her and starts to speak.
‘On my wedding night, I discovered …’ Katherine abruptly stops and furrows her brow. ‘No, I need to go back further than that,’ she says, firmly.
She begins again. ‘William first saw me at a feast in Durham, when he was visiting friends. There and then we fell in love.’ Katherine smiles a sweet smile. ‘Love at first sight … we wanted to be wed immediately, but my father prevailed upon us to wait – my mother had only recently died. So we were betrothed and I thought that William was everything I had ever wanted.’
‘We were only to wait a year, but it seemed such a long year, and I saw him only infrequently during that time. They were such sweet meetings though! He was always the same … lovely, witty, strong. He made people laugh, he gathered them to him. I had no doubt we would be happy together.’
Guy shifts in his chair, even though William is dead he still feels jealous.
Katherine's glances at the movement and looks away again. When she speaks, her voice seems to falter. ‘And then one day, a messenger came to my home. William had been injured in a tourney in London. A lance had pierced him low down in his belly. For a while he was not expected to survive the injury. But by some miracle, he lived and both my father and his father decided that we should wait no longer … it had been such an escape … we should get married immediately. ‘
Katherine darts another glance at Guy and continues. ‘I travelled with my father to Hindelford Manor, arriving a few days before the wedding. It was a time of celebration for everyone, me particularly. I had never been happier – I had visited William when he had been injured but he had been too weak to really talk to me and so I was desperately happy to see him recovered.’
She stops talking and the silence lengthens. Guy remembers his promise not to speak and so sits patiently until she begins again.
‘He looked well enough, he said he was well, but he seemed changed to me. He was still the life and soul of any gathering, still good, hearty company, but I felt there was a distracted air about him as though he was concerned about something.’
Another long pause and another glance towards Guy before he senses that she is steeling herself to carry on.
‘Many girls go into marriage completely unprepared for the marriage bed,’ she says, quickly, ‘but I did not. Although my mother had been ill for many years before she died and seemed incapable of talking to me of these things, my mother's sister … oh, she was quite different. She had been married three times and she took the responsibility of telling me everything. I believe she gave me a very good education. So I knew exactly what to expect on my wedding night. And I approached it with excitement, I admit that freely. William and I had only been able to exchange stolen kisses and embraces before, but even then I had felt excited by him. I looked forward to what was to come.’
