The Bad Boy vs. The Bad Girl

Right? Right.

****There was a stupid glich sorry****

**kind of edited** 

I had my head in my hands, squeezing my eyes shut. 

Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. I let Roman, YES ROMAN, see me cry. WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH ME? 

I felt a light tap on my shoulder, and I reluctantly looked up to see a cold glass of water in front of me. I mumbled out a thank you, as I took the glass from Blake's hand and chugged it. 

"You want to tell me now why you came to my door crying?" Blake asked slowly, afraid I might explode again. I don't blame him though, after the whole hour of crying into Blake's chest, rage filled my veins. 

"Dev, she... she said something about my parents and kind of slapped me for the stupidest reason. Do you remember Roman? Yea, well she thought that I kissed him! Do you believe that? God, first off I would never do that to her, and I would never kiss him either! I don't know if she was drunk, but she looked pretty sober to me." I huffed, taking a deep breath after my mini rant. 

"Maybe she was drunk, where did she slap you? Do you need ice?" He asked hurriedly. God, he is perfect. 

"No thank you, I'm fine. And it was on the cheek, but that doesn't matter now. All I want to do is rip her damn face off." I spat, my anger seeping through the seams. 

"Come on Est, you really don't want to do that to your best friend." Blake countered. I turned to him fully. 

"But the thing is Blake, that I do. I want to hurt her. Physically and mentally." I confessed. 

"Esther, I think you need to calm down." Blake said slowly again. I ran a hand through my hair quickly. I felt frazzled, and I felt like my mind is whizzing by; I cant keep up. 

"Blake, you don't go to my school. You don't know... me. You don't know anything." I confessed. "I hurt people. But only the people that deserve it. Dev... she made me... made me into this person who gets angry easily and hates the world. I do things.... bad things, and I don't feel guilty." I couldn't look him in the eyes. I was afraid of what he would think of me. He probably thought I was a nice, sweet girl; jokes on you bud. But the thing is that I wanted to play that part. I wanted to become that sweet, nice girl for Blake, because he deserves a girl just as perfect as he is. 

"I don't know what to say." He mumbled. I nodded my head, in understanding. 

"I'm sorry for intruding." I made my way to the door, and a heavy weight was hanging from my heart because Blake didn't stop me. 

=+=

The sticky air made me feel uncomfortable. I was always a winter girl. I continued to walk down the sidewalk, trying to slow my breathing with each step. 

I went through what I knew in my mind, trying to sort out the thoughts that were running crazy. 

One, I wanted to tear Dev into shreds. 

Two, I have to get over Blake. He deserves someone better than me. 

Three, I have to thank/apologize to Roman. 

Four, find out who I really am. 

Seems pretty easy... Ha. Easy my ass. 

I groaned as I kicked a rock off the sidewalk. I saw my white, rusted mailbox and turned into my front yard. I didn't feel like walking on the pathway, so I walked straight through the vibrant green grass; letting the long whiskers tickle my feet and ankle.