The Ultimate

Graced

"Alright, let me make sure I have this right. You're actually Mandy...the freaking Ultimate that tops even the Cats? As in, you're the one I heard stories about growing up. As in...The Ultimate. The freaking awesome human that can do whatever the fu- heck she wants?"

"We've been over this Jeff."

"I know...I just can't believe I've been crushing on The Ultimate this entire time...crap. Uhm...sorry."

I smother a laugh and try to act tough. That's who I am now. Tough, ferocious, ultimate.

"Ok, Jeff. Seriously, though. Can you teach me? Can you teach me to turn this stuff on and off?"

"Well... I mean it's just habit for me now, but I can try? Didn't you say you had a White Cat following you around? Why not ask her?"

Actually, I hadn't considered it. I guess I was still in the old mode of Angel being more important than me. Though... ok, it's just been a bit confusing. "I don't trust her Jeff."

"Oh...So you trust me?"

"Jeff, who has had my back these last few months at the Coffee shop?"

"You did?" He said, clearly concerned he'd give the wrong answer.

I laughed. He was right. "Ok, Jeff. Ya. But you were there too. Jeff, the point is, I need you."

"You have no idea how many times I wanted to hear you say that..."

"Jeff..."

"Ok, ok. Just tell me one thing." I gave the universal facial expression for 'go on.' "Is there really some cat named Neko that just happens to be your boyfriend?"

I couldn't ignore the pain in my heart at his words. "I- There was... I... don't know anymore." 

"Are...are you ok?" Apparently I had let some tears slip out.

I sniffed and wiped them away, tough and ultimate replacing this pathetic look. "I'm fine. Teach me."

"I will. But it's late now." I looked out the window. He was right. "Tomorrow? After work?"

"During too." I say. I wasn't sure it was the best idea. But at least I was making the final decision and not him.

"of course." he says looking very unsure. 

~

I can still see her face,

It's beautiful, no less.

To be presenced with her grace,

Would be a blessing, I confess.

But stay away, please.

Even if just for me. 

Stay away, my love. 

From me, be free of.

Its too dangerous here,

All around there is fear.

Of here, stay clear.

I am only a smear...