Greyscale [✓]

Chapter 28

CHAPTER TWENTY EIGHT

Hannah sat on the top of the stairs on Christmas day, focusing on nothing but the way the fairy lights that were draped around the house twinkled brightly. She thought of nobody but the twists and turns of the tinsel adorning the extravagant stair-rail, primary colours shining.

It was easier to think about her surroundings than to focus on what was happening downstairs. She and Cameron had arrived early to his parents' house, enveloped in hugs and kisses as they called out greetings. Whilst neither of them particularly looked forward to the day, they both knew how much it meant to her Aunt Sara and so, made an effort. But it had soon been ruined by the arrival of her mother and grandfather.

She vaguely remembered one Christmas many years ago at the tender age of nine, where she had concluded to herself that her grandfather had skin that had never seen a smile. Despite the many years that had passed, as she sat there that day, she decided nothing had changed. He was all sharp angles, pointed sneers and glowering eyes. As a child, he had often forced his way into her nightmares, merging with the monster she saw wearing her mother's face. They were a mixture of revulsion and regret, made entirely of sharp tongues.

This year, just like every year, she tried to avoid them.

She spent some time with her uncle in the kitchen, watching him with the finishing touches of the seemingly never-ending desserts. He sprinkled some powdered sugar over them whilst listening to his niece ramble on and on about school. It meant a lot to him, to see Hannah speak with joy falling off her lips, a feeling he was hadn't been sure she would ever experience.

Jay still remembered the day of her birth, the way his father hadn't allowed anyone but the midwife to be around his sister. The moment he caught sight of his new-born niece, lying helplessly in a cot by herself, something inside of him shifted. Cameron had been a few months old; a round-faced happy baby, a contrast to his cousin. Jasmine hadn't picked her daughter up after giving birth to her, hadn't thought of a name, hadn't wanted her. All she saw when she saw Hannah was Chris and ultimately, his departure.

He and Sara had been the ones to name her, to make up bottles of formula, to console her when she cried and most of all, to be there. She had been a small baby, lungs weak and skin thin but there was no doubt that Hannah had been born a fighter. Looking at her now, he could scarcely believe this was the small little thing – a touch of light in their lives.

"What?" she asked, brows furrowed as she wondered why her uncle was looking at her so strangely. Uncle Jay was always so stoic, barely a fleeting of emotion crossing his face but in that moment, he stared at her with shining eyes.

"I'm just thinking of how I felt when I first saw you as a baby," he answered, throwing an arm around his niece, a rare chink in his armour. "And how big you're getting. It's just weird, knowing you both are all grown up now. I'm so pleased with how you've turned out, so proud of you two."

His honesty warmed her heart and she tried not to sniffle. For some reason, she was more emotional today than any other Christmas had been. Perhaps it was because everything had been fairly repetitive the past eighteen years but now, this year, her life was changing. There was a shift in the atmosphere.

Her grandfather was seated at the head of the dining table, his mouth twisted into a scowl. Whilst they had a very large extended family, not many relatives knew about Hannah's existence and so, their Christmas was always very small. She was always nothing more than a shameful secret; the biggest mistake.

Sara loved the festivities, decorating every inch of the grand house in tinsel but no amount of decorations could cover the darkness.

"One month," her grandfather spat at Cameron, who was shuffling against the sofa he sat on, back straight. "You have one month to decide, boy. By the end of January, you'll need to send your university applications off and you're telling me you haven't decided on what to pursue yet?"