Surviving Keith

Chapter 3: Carla

-CHAPTER 3--

Carla

My head is spinning. I wanted to get out of here, but I can't. I can't because it is my husband's funeral and I just couldn't leave. All night, I've been trying to accomodate everyone--his sisters, some old friends, business partners, everyone. I only had my bestfriend, Mara, by my side. Mara and I have been friends since our High School days, when we were both trying to fit in and were both trying to know what is it we really want. Mara ended up as an Editorial Assistant in one of the country's biggest magazines, while I ended up here, in our house, with my bakery, with Keith. Except, Keith's gone and I just have no idea what to do.

"Drink," Mara said as she came up to me, handing me a glass of water, "You haven't been drinking.You gotta relax."

"I can't," I said, eyeing the crowd. Tonight is the last night of the funeral as my husband is going to be buried tomorrow. I ahven't even written anything for the eulogy; I haven't seen Trixie; Nothing is going right and I just feel like one big mess. 

"I'm here," she said, as if reading my mind.

I squeezed her hand, "I know, M, thank you."

She took a deep breath, "I can't even imagine how hard this is for you. Oh, by the way, Toby called. He says he'll drop by tomorrow. I told him to come with us to the funeral, but he said it might be awkward..." she looked at me, "Have you two spoken at all since--"

"No," I said, not wanting to talk about the big elephant in the room. The thing is, once upon a time,..Toby and I...Well...Back in High School, he told me that he liked me and I always just laughed it off. I mean, we were friends so you probably know how awkward it would've been if ever anything happened. And back then, I really was into my Footballer boyfriend who as I've said, turned out to be a jerk. And then a couple of years back, when Keith and I started dating, he asked me if I ever thought of us being a couple.He said that he has always liked me, loved me, even, and that if I was willing, he'd want to court me, because he has always wanted to. But I refused. Toby is a wonderful guy, but I just wasn't sure about us. Since then, we have gone our separate ways. He's moved from country to country, hasn't attended any reunion whatsoever, and hasn't really kept in touch with me. Not that I could blame him, but I have to admit that I did miss him. He was one of my only friends and I haven't really had anyone looking out for me, except for Mara, all these years. My parents haven't even returned my calls. I just couldn't help but feel alone, especially now.

"Oh, okay," she said, then looked ahead, "Carly," she said. She likes to call me Carly, "Is that Trixie?"

I looked to where she was looking at and noticed my step-daughter making her way to the coffin with a bottle of Chardonnay in her hand. Wearing another one of her many Black dresses, she looked wasted; she looked as if she hand't slept a wink since we knew about her father's passing. I stood up and went up to her just as she stood near the coffin. 

"Trix," I said.

"Jesus Christ," She said through gritted teeth, "What do you want?" Her voice reverberated throughout the room, "Can you just leave me alone? You've been here for days, spending time with my father, can't you just give me a second to at least look at him?!"

"Trix, I'm sorry," I said, "That's not what I meant, okay? You're just...drunk. You need to rest, the funeral's tomorrow--"

"I know."

"I just...About the eulogy--"

She sighed, "You can do it yourself."

"Trix, I'm sure Keith would want you to be there, to--"

She sighed, "You know what? Fine. If you want to take over the world, you can do it. All I was asking was for some seconds of silence for me and my dad. And you can't even allow me that?"

"Trix,"

"Excuse me," She said and walked away, knocking some people and furnitures off.

Mara came up to me, and helped me walk back to my chair. "She's such a brat," she said.

"She's hurting,"

"Fine, but if she ever does that again--"

"M, I'm fine," I said, "I'll just...I should go write something for the eulogy. I'll just grab some supplies."

"Okay," Mara said, "I'm sorry,"

I just smiled lightly. There was nothing more I could do.