A Happy Accident

Forget it

Lindsey sighed heavily, standing at Stevie's hotel room door. He had knocked numerous times and waited about ten minutes at least, but nobody opened the door for him. It was the first official day of their tour and he hoped he would get to talk to her before the show, because he hadn't since she left his room the day before. Things were bad, as he thought - fucked up. And he only had himself to blame. They were getting along perfectly fine, acting happy about the other's personal life, but she just had to decide to take a shower in his bathroom and he just had to walk in on her... Shaking his head, Lindsey went back to his own suite to gather his things and he would be heading to the arena after that.

With his sunglasses on and completely avoiding everyone, Lindsey was led to his dressing room for the night by his assistant. Showing he was in no mood to be around other people, Lindsey shut the door and stopped to breathe for a moment. He had to find Stevie. This wasn't exactly Fleetwood Mac, they weren't going to sing twenty four songs together, but they were going to be sharing a stage after all and their fans were very observant, they would pick up on the smallest details and Lindsey knew some of those would be critics, who later write reviews, he didn't want any rumors flying around.

Taking out his phone, Lindsey hesitated. Would Karen answer his call? Did she even have his number? There was nothing to lose, he shrugged to himself and finding her number, hit the call button.

"Buckingham?" He heard almost immediately.

"Karen, hi. Yeah, it's me. Um... Where are you?"

"Me?"

"Well, Stevie, but I'm sure she's with you."

"We're at the venue, I believe she's having her makeup applied."

"I need to see her before the concert. Could you tell me how to find her?"

"What did you do this time?"

"I... nothing, just..."

"Fine. She told me if I saw you, tell you she wanted to speak to you too."

Receiving directions on how to find Stevie, Lindsey left his dressing room right away and rushed to hers, knocking on the door impatiently, as he heard a tired sounding, come in. Their eyes met in the mirror and she asked her makeup artist to give them some privacy.

"Hey." Then Lindsey said, carefully approaching her.

"Hey." Stevie replied dryly, looking at him as he took a seat on the couch to her right.

"I tried catching you at the hotel, but-"

"Let's just forget about the whole thing, Lindsey." She interrupted, dancing around the subject was the last thing she wanted. "It happened. It's not like we can turn back time and change the events. But if we continue on like this, clearly both feeling rather awkward, it won't do us any good, besides, the shows will suffer too."

Silence followed, making her anxious, but she thought she should let him speak up now. Whatever it was he had to say, she could always disagree and try to prove she was right.

"I can forget the sex, but I can't ignore the fact I admitted to being in love with you."

"You're not, Lindsey, you-"

"Could you for one listen to what I'm saying to you? Don't you think I realize how absolutely fucked up this is? I'm married and I have three kids with my wife, but I'm in love with my ex girlfriend, who left me some thirty years ago! But you know what's the worst, the sickest part is? I can't stand the thought of you committing to another man and I know he makes you happy, but I... I don't want you to be happy with him. I feel like you're mine, still. I feel like you belong to me and only me."

"You have no right whatsoever to feel that, Lindsey." She replied calmly, although, she was quite taken aback by his confession. "I do believe you love me, I do, but I can't let myself to listen to you saying it over and over again, because nothing good ever comes out of it; you go back to Kristen and I go to pick up the pieces of my broken heart."

That hit him and hard, as he closed his eyes, trying not to break down, tears stinging his eyes. "And what if it's different this time?"

"How? We both know you're not going to file for divorce, you told me that two days ago yourself, you said you haven't done that yet because of your children. Your kids haven't turned eighteen overnight, Linds. Nothing will be any different this time..." She was surprised at how well she was keeping herself together, she wasn't even crying, despite how much his and her own words were hurting her.

"But if it were? Tell me, would you forget all about Robert? Would you want to be with me?"

"Lindsey, I don't want to think about it! Please... We can talk about what might hypothetically happen for the rest of the night, but none of it will become true, so... I'm begging you, let's not... Let's not get any deeper into it."

He sighed, signalling his defeat, as he stood up. He put his hand on the door handle, still looking at her, knowing she was using the last bit of strength in her not to start sobbing. But when he left, she did and he heard it, standing on the other side...

The show went a lot better than either of them thought it would, because of the past couple of days. After all, they were professionals. If they managed to work through the mid to late 70's, they were going to work through it now. They ended the last set of songs together and the without any words, went back to their respective dressing rooms.

Back at the hotel, Lindsey was so exhausted, both emotionally and physically, as he fell into bed instantly, wearing his clothes. Although, it wasn't the kind of 'I could sleep through the week' exhausted, it was more of a 'I won't be able to fall asleep and I'll keep on thinking about my fucked up relationship with Stevie' exhausted.

He didn't get to do a lot of that, jumping slightly startled, when he heard a knock and hour or so later. At first, thinking he wouldn't bother, Lindsey went to check who it was after all.

There stood Stevie, wearing her nightgown and a robe over it, barefaced and her hair obviously wet from the shower. Was he supposed to say something, was he supposed to let her come inside?

But she spoke first, making the situation worse from one perspective and a lot better from the other.

"I love you, too."