No longer safe

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I held back a scream as I saw Andrey flying towards the ballet at an amazing speed on Spirit his horse. Why was he going to fast? What was going on. It was March and I was still upset over the fire. Any normal person would be. If someone else died I didn't think I could handle it. The news Andrey was bringing wasn't a death though. Or at least not yet. I pulled my head out of the clouds and went over to the front door of the ballet. Just as I was opening it he was running up to the steps.

"We have to leave Russia." He said out of breath.

"What? Are you crazy! We can't leave!" I was almost outraged. How could he even THINK of leaving!

"Annika...today the tsar was forced to abdicate the throne. He's been put under arrest. My father is being questioned. It's no longer safe. We have to get out while we still can."

Other girls including Alisa and Madame Markova were listening horrified.

"No...maybe he will get the throne back! He's the tsar of Russia for God's sake!" Now I paced the room at an alarming pace. This was crazy! Just this morning every thing was fine! I knew people were outraged with the tsar but really! This? Did it really have to come to a forced abdication!

"Annika he will never get the throne back. The soviets will take care of that. Annika you should hear what they want done to him. Most want him killed. St. Peteresburg is no longer St. Petersburg either."

"I know it's Petrograd. It has been for a while because it sounds too GERMAN! Can you believe it too GERMAN!" Anger flooded through me. How could the Russian people betray their own tsar?!

"Are we really going to leave?" Alisa said in a tiny voice. I knew she was worried. She was a getting older now and understood what we were saying.

"I-I don't know honey. Andrey and I will talk tonight." What was I supposed to tell her? Oh yeah we have to leave before we all DIE? That's when Natya started crying from my bedroom which was right around the corner.

"I will get her." I took the chance to leave but Madame Markova followed me.

"Oh baby. Shh hush." I rocked Natya back and forth trying to sort out my mind.

"I think you should leave Annika. All of you." Madame Markova for the first time ever cried in front of me.

"Leave? What about the ballet?" For the first time in my life I had to think of something more important then ballet. Our lives. I knew if I was to live I would have to leave the world I had known forever.

"Annika you are the best dancer I know and if this revolution wasn't happening you would already be prima but...I can't let you take this chance. Think about the girls."

I looked down at Natya's face. She looked so much like her mother. She had Katya's angel blond hair and sky blue eyes. I couldn't let her stay here. That much I knew.

Then I thought of Alisa. Her laughing eyes and gentle smile. She was such a sweet girl with such a hard life. I knew this revolution hurt her badly. I would do anything to take the pain away.

" I know you are right....I will talk to Andrey tonight like I promised."

Was this really what it was coming to? I knew reality though. I knew it was bad. I knew people were dying left and right. I knew that if the tsar was no longer in control of Russia we could loose everything.

I laid a now sleeping Natya back in her little crib and kissed her face.

"I love you." I walked out of the room following behind Madame Markova. I stopped for one last look before I left. Katya had died in this revolution. I would see to it her daughter didn't. Natya would be a survivor if it killed me.

I had a feeling I had never felt before. I couldn't describe it but it was almost like purpose but different in a way. I walked out to the hallway.

"Andrey a minute please." He nodded and walked to me.

"Yeah what's wrong?"

"Yes." I had to muster up any courage I had in me just to say that.

"Yes...what?"

"Yes we can leave." I wouldn't cry I was done with that. It was time to move on.

He kissed me and looked at me for what seemed forever.

"I will arrange for tickets. We will go together."

I nodded slowly. "I will arrange to leave."

"You won't regret this Annika. It's that safest way."

"I know." With that he left no doubt for the train station. We had to leave soon. There was chance people close in the soviet union would come back for Andrey or for me since my father had been a guard. I called Alisa into our bedroom and explained things to her.

Her face was grim but she showed that she was indeed growing up.

"Do you want my pocket money the tickets?"She said this so seriously it wasn't funny.

I gave her a small smile. "No Alisa we will find the money to leave I promise." I kissed her head and left to go tell Madame Markova.

I was indeed leaving the world I knew so well. The little shops down the road. The ballet shop where I had planned to continue the tradition Katya and I had set and buy Natya's first things there. Now that wouldn't happen. The walls of the ballet seemed to play back memories like a play.

Memories of performances,Christmas's here before Katya and Igorek had married. Birthdays and coming of age presents. Papa and my brothers coming to visit. Then finally 6 year old me and 10 year old Katya being dropped off by Papa. Us looking naturally scared and still hurt over Mama's death. Me hanging onto Papa's neck begging him not to leave us.

"Ah my little Annika. I will never be truly gone. You will become something great one day. This I know."

"No Papa you are wrong." I whispered shaking my head. He was gone and I would never become anything more then ordinary.

I pushed open the door to Madame Markova's office taking a deep breath. This was it. It was all over.

That night I laid in bed staring at the simple wall above me listening to both girls breath slowly in their sleep. I couldn't sleep though. I knew back home Andrey wasn't sleeping either. For the simple fact that he was right. Russia was no longer safe. The country I had been born in and was so proud of was now murderous and dangerous.

Those three words he had said still rang in my head crystal clear. As if a loud bell had rung and was now echoing in the room and it was saying no longer safe.

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