Paaji and the PARISite

Paaji and the PARISite - Chapter 7

Chapter 7 – Bella

“It’s Friday, Friday, gotta get down on Friday, everybody’s lookin’ forward to the weekend, weekend.” I heard someone belt out. Holy crap, what is wrong with Icelandic people’s taste in music?!

And someone’s screaming in agony. Well… at least someone has musical taste here. And it sounds like Edward. Why must he insist on being in proximity with people like that? The sound’s coming from the left, from the left... and there’s this munchkiny building. Easy-peasy lemon-squeezy. I walked up the stairs to see Edward literally frozen…

And America’s screechy weapon herself…

Wait, why’s Rebecca Black even IN Iceland? It makes no freaking sense at all. Maybe she was the one who started the zombie apocalypse. What a nimblecoomb(I’m trying to purify my language)deedoombda! She got our classroom full of mucus! I’m gonna kill that whorag(combination of whore/hag) right now.. Bloody stupid American 8th grader.

“Rebecca, tu est NUL. Nul I tell you, nul. Now, what are your last words?” I whispered sadistically to this wretch who screwed up my unfortunately dying partner-in-crime. I have got to stop watching so many murder mysteries.

“Better trash talk next time.” he said, barely able to open his mouth. “Save yourself. It’s too late for me” he grunted.

“Oh come on! Stick by me. You’re the crazy boy, remember? You can’t just die today! We have to battle out the rest of the year in Iceland!” I exclaimed.

“Oh save me already!” he shouted out loud, and then faked passing out. There was a lot of twitching involved. It’s funny but no one really twitches when they die. But that’s probably not what I should be focusing on.

“Partyin’, partyin’, yeah, partyin’, partyin’, yeah.” the creep continued singing. Goddammit, hey... her temple’s exposed… perfect. I jumped up from Edward and pressed the pressure point on her temple. And down the whorag went. Finally. Off her fatty body fell to the ground, creating a thud which would stay in my heart as the ultimate victory…

For now.

And since her screeching stopped, so did Edward’s dying. Yay world!

“I had the situation under control. I didn’t need your help.” he said, and started walking towards the door. “Are just going to stand there with your mouth open? We should really get going. Trust me, you do NOT want to get stuck with me when I’m hungry.”

Wow, he’s definitely learnt manners from the greats. “Well you have the nerve to say that, person who was frothing from the mouth because of Rebecca Black.” I raised my eyebrows, irritated.

“You see, I’m an Indian. I’m supposed to overreact to stuff. I wasn’t really dying. Baby, I was born this way.” was all he said before leaving me alone with a stirring undead Rebecca Black.