Ikigai (Hiei x OC)

SCARS

It was early; the sun had just begun to come up. The pale pink and purple sky, filled with thick golden clouds, soothed her. Airi stretched, wondering if the others were awake yet. Kuwabara's booming voice drifted over to her.

"Hey shrimpy! I thought you were gone for good!"

Her head snapped in the direction of the camp. She could not see them from where she was and took off at a run. Hiei stood by the fire, covered in dirt and scratches. He would not look at her.

"Where were you?" Kuwabara asked.

"None of your business, fool," he replied.

"Hey! We were worried about you! You don't gotta be a jerk about it."

"Well, we're glad to have you back," Kurama said, taking a sip of his coffee.

Airi didn't utter a word. There was nothing she could say. Hiei turned to walk away from them, speaking to her over his shoulder.

"When you're ready to train, girl, find me."

Glad as she was to hear him address her, his voice was cold. He'd set the tone for their recovery – she was meant to pretend that it had never happened. And she would, if it would make him stay.

She ate a light breakfast, not hungry, but knowing she wouldn't eat again until that night. I can't put this off forever. Nerves surged through her, and the despair she'd been working so hard to overcome rushed back to the surface. Seeing him had brought it all back.

"Good luck," Kurama muttered as she passed.

Hiei had gone further than she expected. He waited for her in a clearing, surrounded by trees on all sides. The sky had darkened, casting a gloomy haze on their surroundings. It was private; far enough away from the camp that anything they said would not be overheard. Not that she expected much conversation.

He had just finished wrapping his hands. Without looking up, he tossed the roll of tape at her. She caught it with the tips of her fingers.

"Use this," he instructed. "It will protect your fists."

She did so clumsily, unsure of the proper technique. As she flexed her fingers, adjusting to the limited mobility, he approached, standing directly in front of her. His scent was reminiscent of the deepest part of the woods, those dense tangles where even the sun could not reach. Had he always smelled this way? She could not remember. Her mouth became dry as she was consumed by his presence.

"Hit me, right here," he said, pointing to the middle of his hand.

She hesitated, trying to imagine how she could throw a punch when all she wanted to do was touch him. Hold him. To kiss him. Anything that would show him what he meant to her. But she could not. Would not.

"Go on. As hard as you can."

Brave face, Airi. She wound up with her eyes targeted on his hand, throwing all of her weight into her fist. It landed, and the shock of it radiated up her arm.

"If you throw a punch like that, you'll break your thumb, or worse."

He grabbed her hand, unwrapping her fingers and reforming them into a proper fist. He moved behind her and adjusted her shoulders, then placed his hands on her hips, pushing one forward and pulling the other back towards his body. Electricity crackled in the space between them.

"This is a basic stance," he said, coming back around to face her. "Memorize what it feels like."

They spent the rest of the morning this way, with short bursts of instruction followed by long bouts of practicing. Hiei spoke of nothing that did not relate to the training, and she did not speak at all. Being with him this way was devastating. Since they'd first met, she had been carefully crafting the foundation of their friendship, one stone at a time. It appeared a single moment knocked them all down.