The Way I Love You

Chapter 19: Honesty

Beyoncés POV:

Being completely finished was a complete relief. Even though I loved being out there in front of my fans, tour ruined me. I had to get back on schedule with reality. I didn't understand the term 'jet lag' until I was faced with it every day.

I was back in my apartment, a month or two following the end of my tour. Michael was in home visiting, his next sho was in a few days.

Michael was laying on the couch with a pair of sweatpants and I was in the kitchen gabbing me a drink. I was walking back when I noticed someone wrong on him.

"Michael how did you get makeup on your leg?" I went to wipe it off when he snatched back and hid his leg. "Michael what the hell was that?"

"It's nothing, just leave it alone." He mumbles and turned away.

"Michael what's wrong? Why did you get all protective over yourself. What aren't you telling me? You're scaring me Mike."

"Vitiligo." He lowered his head.

"Vitiligo? Mike what is that? You're starting to scare me even more."

I walked five to him and lifted his head in my hands. He looked me in my eyes then cleared his throat. "Vitiligo, is basically a disease that causes me to lose the color of my skin over time. I have a team of dermatologists working to clear everything out of the worse of the next few years."

"Mikey, why didn't you tell me this before? I never would have expected this, i'm so sorry."

"Please don't feel sorry for me, I'll be fine. I have everything planned out. I've expected that I won't be this color forever. I'll end up much lighter. It's gotten worse over the last few months. The worse it gets, the longer i'm in the makeup chair and the longer we have to taylor my cloths to cover majority of it."

"Would it make you feel better to explain it all to me?"

He nodded so I sat down on the couch and so did he. I swung my legs around and laid them across of him. I listened closely to everything he said. From how he found out, to how long until he'll be a completely different skin complexion. Deep down I felt awful for him, he was loosing what he looked like. No black person wants to lose their skin, it's what makes up stand out. It shows our history, like a book of untold tails.

And for Michael to lose his showed how vulnerable he was. He was torturing himself by wearing long selves during the summer time. He just wanted to hide it from the press. Once they hear a story, they take it and run with it.

Six weeks later...

I sitting across of my sister as watched Michael rehearse for his next concert. I sat back and swayed softly with the baby in my arms trying to disturb his nap.

"So sissy, how have you been, truly?"

"Ever since Danny it's been hard sometimes Trying to snap back to my old self is practically impossible in just under a few months. It's just hard seeing how I am after him. Now don't get me wrong, I love my baby boy and my bony for creating him. But not feeling myself sucks really bad."

"I'm so sorry sissy. I wish there was something I could do, would us starting to work out help?"

"Why would you need to workout? You basically a black Barbie."

"Just like everyone else I have my insecurities and after your I started to let myself go. I just need to whip back into shape."

"Then of course sis. Give me a time and i'll find a babysitter."

I looked over to Michael who was laughing to himself. "I may have found you one."

"Mike? Does he ever like kids?"

"Girl does he like kids? He loves them so much. He s always spending time with charity and hangout up the kids. He loves being with them. I think he would work perfect with our little prince right here."

I leaned down and kiss the top of Danny's soft head. A smile formed on his face and tighten his hold on my finger.

"When are you going to have one?" My sister broke the ice and smiled.

"Oh gosh who knows when. Michael and I are in our prime right now. We may live kids but I don't know if we want our own. I think that'll be a while form now. We aren't even married Solange."

"You guys practically are and don't bring up the little break. That was a small pause and now you'll are back better than ever. I think itll happen soon."

"What will happen?"

"He'll propose."

I began thinking about the possibility of him proposing. I'm sure he would be all romantic but private. We both love our privacy. I dont see it happening anytime soon though. He's super focused on his career, and so am I.

Michael was finished rehearsing some time after late, so I said my goodbyes to Solange and Danny then they left.

I was now sitting ion the bed watching tv then Michael walked in drag out the shower.

I wanted to ask him really bad about it, it was killing my mind. So I had to push my scared feeling away .

"Mike... Can I ask you something?"

"Of course baby." He laid cross the bottom of the bed and stared into my eyes.

"When do you want to have kids of your own? Is that something you even want?"

"Of course Bee, it's my dream. I love kids, you know this. Having my own would get me to slow down and focus on my family. I can't wait till that time comes. Why's that? Are you trying to tell me something?"

He perked up and moved closer to me with a huge smiles. I nudged his face back and he dramatically fell back. "No Mike i'm not pregnant. No pregnancy until I get my ring and lavish wedding."

"I can have that arranged asap."

"No Mike be serious. I just wanted to see if that could be in our cards. We both live children, but did we want our own type of thing."

"I understand you, but trust me I can arrange a ceremony anytime."

"We'll get married when we're both back to our old selves. If you think about it, we could've been engaged if we never broke up. I want us to get back there Mikey. I miss the old us so much. We were so happy."

"Damn you make us sound miserable now."

"Michael you know what I mean. Do you think we'll ever get back there?"

"Of course, just give it time baby. I got you remember? And you got me remember? We good baby."