This is the exact book of the real dork diaries series book. For those who don't have the book in real life, this book is your go-to! Enjoy, and full credit to Rachel Renée Russell for writing this amazing book!
The past twenty-four hours of my life have been so disgustingly NAUSEATING that I'm actually starting to feel like a... puddle of. . .um, cat. . .VOMIT!!
First I ruined my brand-new sweater with PBJ and pickle sandwich (a long story).
Then I got hit in the face by a dodgeball during gym in front of the ENTIRE class and ended up trapped in a wacky fairy tale (an even longer story!).
Okay, I can handle the utter HUMILIATION of walking around school OBLIVIOUS to the fact that a sandwich is stuck to my abdomen like duct tape.
Hey, I can even handle a mild concussion. However, what I CAN'T handle is the fact that "someone" started an awful rumor about me!
I overheard two CCP (Cute, Cool & Popular) girls gossiping about it in the bathroom.
Rumor has it that my CRUSH kissed me (at a charity event last weekend) on a DARE merely to snag a FREE large pizza from Queasy Cheesy!
Of course I totally FREAKED when I heard it! Not only is a dare like that rude and insensitive, but it's a very cruel joke to play on a person like. . .well. . .ME!
I was SURE the whole thing was a big fat LIE! Sorry! But everyone knows Queasy Cheesy pizzas are just NASTY! Had it been on a dare for a yummy Crazy burger, I'd TOTALLY believe it!
Hey, I'll be the first to admit, that rumor could have been a LOT worse. But still. . .!! I just wish "someone" would stay out of my personal business. And by "someone" I mean my mortal enemy. . .MACKENZIE HOLLISTER 😔!!
I don't know why that girl HATES MY GUTS! It wasn't MY fault Principal Winston gave her a three-day detention for "unsportsmanlike behavior" for slamming me in the face with that dodgeball.
I'm really LUCKY I'm not in a COMA right now! Or undergoing life-threatening surgery. . .
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Anyway, as a punishment for what Mackenzie did to me, she has to clean the bug-infested showers in the girls' locker room.
Unfortunately, I learned today that the bug problem in there is REALLY bad!!
I was sitting behind Mackenzie in French class finishing up my homework when I noticed there was something stuck in her hair.
At first I thought it was one of those fancy designer barrettes she loves to wear. But when I took a closer look, I realised it was actually a gigantic dead STINK BUG!! EWW!!
That's when I tapped her on the shoulder. "Um, Mackenzie! Excuse me, but I just wanted to let you know that-"
"Nikki, WHY are you even talking to me?! Just mind your OWN business!" she said, glaring at me like I was something her spoiled poodle, Fifi, had left in the grass in her backyard.
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