Chasing

Chapter 1|the other woman

        "To my siblings that I failed to protect"
-author
MILENA
"You are always like this! When was the last time when you paid attention to me!"I could hear mom's yelling from my room. Even tho our rooms were far enough from each other I couldn't just ignore their usual yelling and arguments.
I grabbed my phone from my nightstand and checked the time. 9:39. I let a breath of relief and put my phone back on the nightstand.
"I don't need your yelling and screaming at me early in the morning. What exactly do you want from me?! I give your everything you can possibly ask for. What is it that you want from me?!"dad yelled back at mom throwing something as usual. I tried to cover my ears but it was useless.
Where the hell are my headphones?!
I tried to search for them in the drawer but my hand suddenly froze when I heard my mom's next words.
"Oh, I'm really grateful for you cheating on me! Who is that woman, huh?! I saw your texts and I read all of them! How could you do this for me!? For whole five years...do I mean nothing to you?!"mom's sobbing made my heart shatter into pieces. I couldn't understand what was happening. Was I still asleep? Was it just another nightmare? Of course I knew my parents have been arguing a lot lately but...I never thought dad would do something like that. Usually their arguments would be about things that didn't mean much and they would get along after few hours.
I couldn't hear what they were talking about anymore. It felt like my brain was ignoring them. The last thing I heard was door of my parents' bedroom slamming shut.
I wiped the tear from my cheek and with shaky hands I poured a glass of water from the bottle that I always have on my nightstand and chug it down. I tried to calm down but mom's words kept spinning in my mind. I just wanted to chop off my head to stop these words.
After few minutes of trying to shut my thoughts, I decided to take a shower. Usually when I feel terrible, especially now when I can't feel more terrible than this, I take cold shower. It does help me to shut my thoughts at the bay of my mind.
I don't really know why I took that long in the shower but when I got out of the shower it was already past 1pm. It was a good thing that we don't have any lessons today. Usually they just decline our lessons on Fridays due to some events they hold for outsiders at our school. It's like a private school so if you are rich they won't bother you.
Since I don't like staying at home much, I go to library to study. I have already passed all the important exams we take for applying to universities so it doesn't really matter what we study. I mean we are in 11th grade so basically I'm gonna graduate after few months. But I love spending my time in the library. Books are my only escape from my messed up reality.
I quickly put on pair of custom pants and white polo sweater. Tying my mid length dirty blonde hair in a low bun, I put on some concealer under my eyes to actually look like a person who sleeps for more than six hours at least. I usually sleep for four to five hours mostly and that's when I'm lucky enough. Spraying perfume I grabbed my Dior bag and my fur coat, since it has been snowing a lot lately and walked out of my room.
I thought for some time thinking should I check on mom before I leave? Maybe I should. But what if she wants to be alone? No, still I need to check on her.
I walked down the hallways and knocked on the door. When no one answered I slowly opened the door not to wake up mom in case if she fell asleep and dropped my bag and coat to the floor, looking at the sight in front of me.
"Oksana!"I called one of the maids loud enough for her to come rushing to me.
"Yes, miss-"she cut herself off gasping her eyes widening in shock.
"Quickly call the ambulance. I will try waking her up."I kept my voice calm, or I tried my best to sound calm not to scare Oksana. I calmly walked over to mom and sat down. Slowly I put her head on my lap and checked her pulse. When I noticed that I couldn't feel any pulse my hands trembled a bit. But I kept calm. I needed to keep calm. I needed to act mature at situations like this.
I could hear Oksana calling the ambulance while shaking in fear. I knew ambulance won't help. We were already late. I stared at my mom's steel blue eyes that looked lifeless. They already looked lifeless before she took her own life, but now she was gone.
"Моя красивая мамочка."(My beautiful mother.)I kissed her cold cheek. Finally you are free. Finally you got what you have been chasing for the long time.
I didn't shed any tears. I just couldn't. I didn't know how to cry in front of someone. No matter how broken I was. I just simply hold her in my arms. For the last time I was holding her....
I will see you later, mom.