umkansa - atwow highschool au

twenty four

neteyam

Neteyam hadn't spoken to his brother in days, and truthfully he really, really wanted to. It took absolutely everything in him not to give in, let his guard down, and finally communicate with Lo'ak again. But he just couldn't. Every time he thought about the words that escaped Lo'ak's mouth during that night, his heart dropped. It was such a petty little argument too, he could barely remember how it even started anyways.

In all honesty he knew Lo'ak was telling the truth. Yes, about the whole hiding thing, but mostly about the fact that he didn't mean it. He knew Lo'ak would never have any ill intentions behind his words, he just talks sometimes before processing his words. Neteyam knew this about his brother, but it didn't make it hurt any less. Although Lo'ak may not have meant what he said, it was the fact that Lo'ak used Neteyam's fear of coming out against him. Neteyam didn't like that he had to hide. He never liked that he had to hide. But he was scared. He was so very scared. Ao'nung had never seemed to have an issue with the whole "hidden-relationship-that's-technically-not-a-relationship-yet" thing. They never really talked about it, and truthfully Neteyam was grateful. He didn't know if he was ready for that conversation yet because he didn't know what Ao'nung would think. Along with that, he was scared that Ao'nung wouldn't want to be with him anymore because of it.

The car rides to school were severely awkward. Well, for everyone except Kiri. She always sat silently with her headphones on usually listening to music or just taking a quick power nap before class. Kiri wasn't the best at picking up on social cues, so the great tension between her two brothers went completely unnoticed by her. On the other hand, the tension was greatly felt by Neteyam. He would sneak quick glances at his brother in the backseat through the rearview mirror. Lo'ak was seen sulking, never taking his eyes off the nature outside the
window. It was like this for the past three days, and honestly it was killing Neteyam inside. He missed his brother so much. They had never avoided each other for this long before. Actually, Neteyam had never avoided Lo'ak for this long before. Of course Lo'ak had tried to reach out on countless occasions via text messages. Neteyam just didn't have the guts to reply yet.

Lo'ak :)
neteyam i'm really sorry
i swear on my life i didn't mean it
i was being stupid i love u
pls pls forgive em
me*
delivered 3:42 am

Lo'ak :)
are u gonna ignore me forever 😞
i've actually never felt so bad in my life
neteyam pls talk to me
i cant even sleep
delivered 4:06 am

Lo'ak :)
do u hate me?
delivered 4:15 am

Lo'ak :)
goodnight tey, love you
delivered 4:38 am

Neteyam wanted to respond. He was supposed to respond, he planned on responding, he told himself he would respond. But he just couldn't. Every time he was about to respond he would quickly delete it all and turn his phone off. He felt so bad leaving his brother in the dust like this. Lo'ak has never been good with confrontation so he never really made an effort to talk to Neteyam in person, it was just the constant desperate text messages. Neteyam couldn't help but feel overwhelming guilt each time his phone buzzed with a message notification from his brother. There were times Neteyam would walk past Lo'ak's room and hear sniffles. He couldn't tell if he was imagining it or if Lo'ak was truly hurting just as much as he is. He just wanted to rush in there and hug him and tell him he forgave him.

When they pulled up to the school parking lot, Neteyam found a park and turned the car off. He woke Kiri up from her mini nap and all three siblings got out the car. The walk up to the school doors was completely silent besides the sound of their footsteps on the gravel. First entering the building, Kiri immediately departed from her brothers to go meet up with Rotxo before class, leaving Lo'ak and Neteyam alone. Neteyam hesitated a little before speaking.

"I'm going to meet up with Ao'nung"

"Huh? Oh. Okay, yeah" Lo'ak sighed as Neteyam walked away. He kicked the invisible dust on the floor as he watched his brother walk away.

That was progress right? He didn't want Lo'ak to think he hated him, because he didn't. He could never. Lo'ak had been his best friend since he was born. Neteyam cherished Lo'ak and would never let anyone hurt him. He just still needed a little more time until he could really talk to him. Ao'nung was waiting for Neteyam by the vending machines, per usual. His eyes seemed a little bluer today than they were the last time he saw him. Or maybe Neteyam was just paying a little more attention. As he approached Ao'nung, he could see the little smirk slowly developing on the boys face the closer he walked towards him.

"Hey" Neteyam said, almost at a whisper.

"Hey," Ao'nung replied. "No luck?" He gestured toward Lo'ak who was standing alone, hands in pockets and head down.

Neteyam just shrugged, a small frown forming on his face. "I feel kinda bad, I mean he did say he didn't mean it," Neteyam bit his lip as he looked at his brother once more. He could see Kiri and Rotxo approaching him and the three of them walking off together. Tsireya wasn't at school today, she was sick with a cold. His frown slowly dissolved seeing his brother not having to walk alone to class. "Don't feel bad. Your feelings are valid, and I'm really proud of you for standing your ground," Ao'nung set a reassuring hand in Neteyam's shoulder before pulling him into a hug. Neteyam let out a deep breath, welcoming in the embrace.

"Hey, Tey,"

"Yeah?"

"You know I like you right?"

"Huh?" Neteyam held his breath for a second before removing himself from the hug. Ao'nung smiled as he looked down at Neteyam, blue eyes never leaving contact with Neteyam's amber ones.

"I like you, Tey. And I want you to know that,"

Neteyam didn't say anything after that. He just stared at Ao'nung like a clueless puppy, mouth slightly dropped open. Why wasn't he saying anything? He blinked when Ao'nung intertwined their hands and gave Neteyam's a small squeeze.

"Cmon, we're gonna be late for class" Ao'nung grinned before leading the way.

A/N : bit of a shorter chapter this time, but i really wanted to update this story! next chapter will definitely be longer, hope you enjoyed :) thank you so much to everyone who's taken the time to read this story and if you got this far i want you all the know how much i love and appreciate all the support!