Like Starlight and Wine (A Baldur's Gate 3 Astarion x Tav Fanfic)

25. A Night of Ecstasy

A wild author appeared! She wrote a disclaimer! It was very effective!: Mature sexual content ahead. I'll try to keep the explicitness to a minimum, as I'm not accustomed to writing smut, and would rather lay this scene out as something poetic and intimate rather than pornographic. Still, it'll probably be descriptive enough - and with the nature of the content in general I just recommend adult audiences for this chapter. Also, I apologize for the length of this chapter, it just seemed to keep writing itself and I couldn't seem to find a good place to break it in half to be two chapters. So here we are. Now that's all out of the way, I hope you enjoy! Thank you.

It is a typical night at camp. Gale's been standing at the mouth of his tent, playing around with magical spells, Shadowheart's been secretly trying to figure out the mystery of the mutli-sided object in her possession while pretending she's meditating or something, Lae'zel has been training with her weapons and sharpening them to perfection. Nothing is out of the ordinary. Nothing at all. Well... except for the fact that everything is different. 

I sit in front of the campfire, hugging my knees close to my chest as I watch the flames dance, my mind replaying everything that happened earlier on repeat, trying to make sense of it. Did Astarion really mean the things he said? Was he actually interested in taking things to... that level with me? It hardly makes sense. We've still only known each other for such a short amount of time... mere days. Maybe a week? I've lost track of the time exactly, but I know it hasn't been long. I've only just begun to scratch the surface of who he really is... and he knows even less about me. He doesn't know that I'm a raving, blood-thirsty monster with thoughts and desires that would make the most hardened criminal pee his pants, or vomit... or both.

It's not that I would mind getting closer to Astarion... in fact, as much as I hate myself for it, the very idea of it makes my heart flutter and swell and ache all at once. When he's near me, I feel at peace and when he's away I can't help but notice his absence, even on a subconscious level. What does that mean anyway? I know next to nothing about matters of the heart... I've been a beast of carnage and instinct for such a long time, and I've only just become... myself recently thanks to the tadpole. I have no idea what I'm doing here... I have no idea what these emotions are, or what it is that I want exactly. The only thing I know is that I want Astarion by my side in whatever capacity this unknown desire is, and maybe over time, I can figure it out.

But what about Astarion? Is this what he really wants too?

Speaking of the pale elf, I had been so lost in thought I hardly notice the moment he sits down next to me at the fire.

"A quiet evening for once," he says, his voice low as if he doesn't want the others to hear him... as if his honeyed words are meant only for me. A beautiful thought, but I won't delude myself just yet. "Perfect for two people who'd like to take some time to themselves, if you catch my meaning. And I do mean sex, to be clear. We've waited long enough."

I hug my legs tighter to myself, resting my chin on my knees. As curious as I am about a potential night of intimacy with Astarion, I can't help but wonder about his true intentions. It's settled in the pit of my stomach like a small stone... not quite noticeable, a barely there feeling. But it's still there in the back of my mind. Maybe I'm just being paranoid... maybe I'm over thinking this.

"Of course, we'll only do it if you want to," Astarion adds against my silence. "But trust me - you do want to."

I tip my head up and angle my chin, looking into his eyes that sparkle like rubies in the flickering firelight. They're trained on me with precision. But behind that alluring gaze is something else... something pleading. Maybe... maybe all he wants is a night of fun after all. We certainly don't get enough of those. And as for myself... my curiosity is getting the better of me... swelling in me, consequences be damned. I guess I'll deal with those pesky things later. After all, I promised myself a night of new experiences, didn't I? I may never get another chance like this again before the Dark Urge in me turns me back into a rabid beast.