Trackside Temptation

Chapter Thirty-Four

MATTHIAS

"And now, our second-place champion, Matthias van der Burg."

I patiently waited behind the wings as I heard my name being called, followed by the roaring sounds of cheers and screams.

I took a deep breath and put on a smile, waving to the crowd as I stepped foot onto the makeshift stage.

I scanned the crowd, searching for one person and one person only. I saw her to my right and made eye contact immediately. It didn't take long for her sad eyes to look away.

"This is an amazing achievement," an old man said as he held out his hand.

I shook it before gracefully accepting my trophy and holding it up for the cameras. No one could have guessed I had just done the worst fucking thing a person could do to someone. I broke my promise and let her down.

My dad was standing on the other side, shaking his head with disappointment. I frowned, and suddenly I felt a lot worse. I'd also let him down like I had every time I came second in my karting races. He fixed me with a scathing gaze, and I had to avert my own eyes to escape the intensity. I tried to focus my attention on something else, but only one thing could make me feel warm inside—even if her stare still told me she was broken.

She closed her eyes, and I could only guess it was because she was trying to forget everything. She was trying to forget me. I didn't know how long she'd closed them for, but I couldn't look away.

I knew the cameras would be capturing this moment, and I dreaded what would be said about it tomorrow. But I didn't care. I need to look at her again.

She opened her eyes eventually, but it didn't take long for her to shake her head in disappointment. She was telling me that I couldn't do that anymore. I couldn't look at her and remind myself of everything we'd been through. I couldn't appreciate that she was the most beautiful woman I'd ever laid my eyes on. She wasn't mine to have.

I watched as she turned around and disappeared into the crowd. I didn't know it was possible, but my frown deepened even more as I lost sight of her.

"Congratulations man," Theo said to me. I congratulated him back, but my gaze was still searching the crowd. I had no idea where she went, but I was certain that her suffering was a consequence of my actions and my actions only.

It didn't take me long to realise that she'd only done what she'd been told. We wouldn't be celebrating a first and second win if I hadn't slowed down. I disgusted myself for saying those cruel words to her out of anger. But my anger wasn't a good enough excuse. There was no excuse for what I'd done.

Nico walked over to me and pulled me in for another hug. I was beginning to appreciate these affectionate moments with him. He was the father I needed but never had, despite my own still seething in the distance.

"You did well," he said.

I nodded. "Thank you."

"And thank you for being a team player today. I know it wasn't easy, but you've done a great job for us all. You'll have another chance next year, and we know you'll be at your strongest."

I smiled. "You should be thanking Francesca. She's helped me the most, and I'm sure she'll continue to help our team."

Nico's eyes filled with worry, and I sensed he was on the brink of delivering some bad news. "Has she not told you?" he sighed.

My eyebrows creased. "She's not really talking to me at the moment."

Nico looked confused, but he didn't question it further. "She resigned this morning."