𝓛𝓸𝓿𝓮 𝓣𝓱𝓪𝓽 𝓝𝓮𝓿𝓮𝓻 𝓑𝓵𝓸𝓸𝓶𝓼 [𝓗𝓮𝓮𝓴𝓲] ✔️

Chapter -29

Niki Pov

1st, January, 2023,

Coffee poured into the cup, snow bubbles drew on our window pane. The cold touching our warm skin while the light still blazing in the dining room.

It's New Year. The first day of the New Year. And I can feel my fingers fidgeting nervously at the thought of Our first ever New Year as a Couple.

It's sweet, the coffee tasted too sweet. But I only added two spoons of sugar, ain't I?

Whatever. Over all the sweet, I can still tinge the stinginess of a little bud of a bitter. Why?

Maybe, beacuse of the thought of 'what she gonna say?' after confessing to Mom.

*Sighs*

It's already time. Time to confess to Mom. 

He loved me secretly. So secretly that I had get to witness it by eavesdropping. And now We are dating. I don't want to date secretly too. I want to Us to be open as a cover of a book. No matter how many judge, all I wanna care is the letters of his heart that enhanced on the cover and can protect on my way through. 

But...can I do this? What she gonna say? *Groans*

"What are you thinking so deeply?" Mom glittered her brows in speak of my silence. 

"I-I have something on my mind." I stammered. Her eyes for the first time stirred cold on mine, abling the lump in my throat to non-void my peace. "It's..something I want to share with you too." I queered out in heavy drums.

"Okay! Cool. What is it?" She pictured out the snowballs from the window and waited for me to explore with her eyes now on the white garden.

"I like Hyung. Heeseung Hyung." My fingers instantly balled up into a fist while my eyes reluctantly stood on my no expression face.

In seconds, she trailed with a snort chuckle while still minding the vision of her Polaroid. "Yeah! I know"

"No. You don't."  My frigid voice echoed the walls and to the old garment on the floor which is lying next to her feet.

"I don't?" In choice, she queries.

"Have you remembered the day when I said there's a stalker in my school who write letters to me?" 

"Yep! What's about it?" She squints.

A deep sigh exhaled out my mouth. In tense, I ran my fingers through my hair and tucked it up. "It's Hee Hyung. Heeseung Hyung wrote those letters to me."

Her eyes ran back on me while her brows frowned up tight. "Really?" She sounded in unsure of what to say while her Polaroid stood down in her arms aside, weakly.

"Yeah" Is all what I can say.

"T-then does he~"

"Yes, I love Him too Mom."

"WH-at?" Her vocals trembled at the sight of unawareness. "What do you mean Niki? What are you talking?" With few steps ahead, she stood in front me, infront of my eyes bearly.

"Mom!" Keeping the Polaroid aside on the table, I held her arms. "I like Him. I like Him very much." As the words passed out, my tears sung down my eyes. 

Please allow me.

In seconds all my dareness and braveness fell into the river. I found myself hiccuping in tears, in her arms.

Ahugg! I hate this.

"From when? When did you start liking him Son?" She asks while stroking my shoulder.

"From the moment when I saw Him as a Lee Heeseung." When I came to know His real self and all His love, I couldn't stop myself from falling to Him. It's like a big magnet pulled me into His arms. And I was caught and tied up by a chain of flourish. Then who-who am I to not to cherish it?

"It's okay. It's okay." In the strokes as I puffed, she hugs me in her embrace on the sofa.

"It's not okay." I say. "It's wrong, right?" I asks.

"What's wrong?" Through my wet lashes I face her.

"Loving Him. Isn't it wrong?" 

"Who said loving him would be wrong?" She chuckles making me sit on the sofa straight. To make things right.

"Hyung. Hee Hyung said it is wrong to love Him as He is my step- Brother." I voices out in struggle.

"Niki, I want you to know Three things." She clasps my hand and moves her head up to project me well.

As I nod and wait for her, she gloomed a smile and says, "First, Whenever you have inner dealings, think about You and what Your heart says. And when You talk to me, talk what Your heart really feels and wants. Because I don't know unless you word it out. And I wanna know better." In her touch, all I can find is comfort and ease.

"Second, it doesn't matter how many others say, it is never wrong to love someone. Never. Though the proximity here a bit is yes as  because of the bond you two have is 'Step-Brothers'-but still that doesn't never be wrong to how your heart feel about him. Know that, okay?" 

It is the second time we ever had this type of serious and parent-son discussion after my Dad's funeral. Whenever I listen to her talk, I just wanna keep listen because she always speaks and speaks with all her positiveness, lamping my mind. I just wanna sleepy in her lap, it always is cozy.

"Third, whatever you are I'm here for you. Just come back home. That's all what I want. Can you do that?" She snuffles in anguish. 

After all the things, I can feel her pain. The fear of being empty with the leave of our loved ones, is just so hard to back up. 

 And moreover, covering tears in soaking blood is beyond a life. I don't wanna face the reality of how Heeseungie sees and fears. It's too painful.

"Yeah" Through my hoarse throat I spoke when her eyes seeked my answer.

"No. You don't just 'Yeah' me like that. Speak." She coins.

A deep sigh. *Sighs* A deep breathe. *Inhales* This New Year affined Our Love with flourish.

"I understood. Obviously, I will definitely do that." She smiles after hearing my answer.

"And last but not least, don't avert or prevent the things because of me. I hate it."

"Mom, it's not like tha~" she scoops me off by cuffing my hand while eyeing me seriously in talk.

"Don't talk in middle." She voices out and I shuts my zip up. "After all the things which happened in my life, I just...just don't want it to happen the same way to you too. Let's all be happy. Together. I don't care whatever comes, let's all stay together and protect each other. Like a Family. That's a Family." 

The fact she wants all of us together no matter what happens- is just scares me on how scared she is with all this Life.

"Yeah, no matter what. We are a Family." Taking my hands from her, I stokes her wet cheek. 

Me, Mom and My boyfriend Heeseung Hyung.