Chapter 23

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(Ruin My Life By Zara Larsson)











Corpse's Pov















TW- Panic Attack














I fucked up.


I know I fucked up.


I'm trying to fix it.


But she's nowhere to be found...?








"She's not answering anything. She's completely off the grid. It's been three days since Eryn went to check her apartment. I've been texting her everyday, yet I still have gotten no answer." I ranted to Karl and Cora who were on FaceTime with me.

My camera was off because I did not feel like doing anything. Julie fell off the grid, I have no idea where she is, what she's doing, and I'm scared shitless.

"Matteo? I'm going out." Roxanne spoke in a soft tone, knowing that I was minutes from exploding.

"Be safe. Text me. Let me know if anything happens. I'm one call away. Love you." I said quickly because I don't feel like speaking... To anyone. The front door opened and shut. I huffed as I looked down at my phone.

"Everything is going to work out." Karl said, while Cora scoffed.

"Don't take advice from the man who lost his girlfriend at first." Cora rolled her eyes with a smile on her face.

"Guys. I have to go. I can't sit here anymore and pretend like I'm not drowning without her. I need to go for a ride. I can't do any of this right now."

Before either of them could protest, I hung up the phone and threw it down onto my couch. I let out a groan, feeling so beyond frustrated with myself.


I let myself fall in love with Julie, I let myself fall flat on my face in love with her, and I don't think she feels the same at all.

I was wearing gray sweatpants, with a white tank top. My smiley face socks that my sister got me. It was embarrassing but I don't care because I haven't left my house in a week and a half.


I desperately need to clear my head.


I walked into my room, changing into black cargo pants, a black tank top, and putting on my boots. I would put on a jacket when I decided to leave, but right now I need the basics. I walked back into the living room of my apartment, grabbing my phone and putting it in my pocket.

I never thought it was possible to miss a person this much, but I missed Julie terribly. Everything in the world felt frozen without her. I need her. She's the breath of fresh air that I have been starving from for years.

My phone rang, causing me to take it out of my pocket again. I looked at the caller, and I let out a deep breath. I answered the phone, and closed my eyes before leaning against my counter in my kitchen.

"Matteo?" A panicked voice came through my phone, and I suddenly was the one panicked.

The anxiety filled my veins, and I waited for the next words. I waited for the worst. I expected the worst. It's been three days since I have heard from Eryn Blake, and now she's calling me in a panic.

"What's wrong?" I asked. I could hear her deep breathing, I could hear the panic in the way her voice cracked.

"You know how I came to Julie's apartment three days ago, and I told you she wasn't here? I lied to you. She was here, but I knew she needed space." Eryn rambled on, and I felt everything stop.

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