ओह! यह छवि हमारे सामग्री दिशानिर्देशों का पालन नहीं करती है। प्रकाशन जारी रखने के लिए, कृपया इसे हटा दें या कोई भिन्न छवि अपलोड करें।
SYNOPSIS ➫ He likes what you used to make him feel.
NOTES ➩ I am finally free from school (for now). All of my Kaveh drafts are 90% angst. Also this is just gonna be very short cuz... sometimes short ones are better (idk)
CONTENTS ➬ angst, very small signs fluff, gender neutral reader, no dialogues, word vomit
ओह! यह छवि हमारे सामग्री दिशानिर्देशों का पालन नहीं करती है। प्रकाशन जारी रखने के लिए, कृपया इसे हटा दें या कोई भिन्न छवि अपलोड करें।
He doesn't know much about what you shared with him.
The sharing of something makes him feel whole and alive. It felt unreal, it made him question if what he was experiencing was part of reality or merely part of his hungry delusions that help him cope with this realistic experience.
He wants to stay. He wants to stay and always experience this feeling with you alone.
And he was always so grateful that you were willing to stay for him.
Maybe sooner or later, the two of you can come to an understanding on what this kind of feeling really is. That's his initial thought.
But a few drops of reality would seep through the barricades that he hammered down onto the locked door that he hides behind in his mind with this feeling you would make him experience.
As time went on, this feeling of his liking was being wiped away slowly. How could it? He is still willing to spend forever and always with you to find out that exact meaning of what you were making him feel.
Why is it blurring away into nothing but smudged remains of what used to be?
That 'sooner or later', that he was always waiting for, happened. Just not in the way he always intended for it to happen.
Sooner or later, it was gone. The feelings you made him experience were gone. And you were as well.
He found it laughable how years of pining and anticipation to understand and keep something, was now gone in the blink of an eye.
Maybe reality caught up to him. Or maybe some unknown God was looking down at him, pitying his mind that was blocking away any sense of reality and helped him come to the realization that he can't stay like that.
Though in his mind, he preferred the version of himself when he was with you. A naive and selfish person, blinded by the affection you always gave him.
Now he feels like a wild animal roaming around the city streets of where you two first met.
Now he's just an experienced and empty-shelled person of who he used to be.
Can he really blame you? Can he really be mad at you?
He can't find himself to do such things.
Maybe it's his fault that he failed to realize that those feelings you shared were nothing more than a temporary happening. It was too long to ever call it a fling— and above all, it hurts calling it that.
Maybe because it was more than just a fling. An experience? Maybe you did help him experience what reality really is.
He was confused whether to glorify what you did or commit to the urge to yell at you for what you were doing to him.
He wasn't foreign to the idea of people leaving your life to become strangers you see in the streets. He experienced it first hand, he was starting to forget about it. But now, it all seemed to repeat itself with you.
He wanted to turn up at your front door, to just be vulnerable once again, to just ask what went wrong— to ask how he can ever fix it.
Because he doesn't know anything.
It made him think, maybe that was the reason. Was it because he relied on your self-made heaven and was blinded on whatever was happening outside of it?
Did he rely too much on such bliss you gave him to ever genuinely care?
He thought of every path that underwent every possible solution to this grand mystery in his mind.
All of them lead straight back to you.
But he knows he can't take any of them.
It was impossible to find a path without leading him back to your arms. Because he knows that if he goes back to you, you wouldn't feel the same welcoming feeling that he wants you to feel.
The only thing he can ever do is to stay right where he was, waiting for something else to happen.
It wasn't a very healthy choice, but he decided to stay, haunted by the past memories of the blessing in disguise you gave him.
He antagonized you as much as he glorified you. And to be honest, he felt the same way about himself.
Now all he can ever really do is to stay put. Watching as everyone around him moves forward in life, knowing full well he can never find himself to be able to do the same.
ओह! यह छवि हमारे सामग्री दिशानिर्देशों का पालन नहीं करती है। प्रकाशन जारी रखने के लिए, कृपया इसे हटा दें या कोई भिन्न छवि अपलोड करें।
Word Count : 755
Yeah shorter than usual, I just finished a whole week of exams 😭 and another set of exams in a few weeks from now :(
I'm working on a Wriothesley one tho, and planning writing a star rail one shot if I ever have the time.
I also wanna start writing a wanderer x reader fic I've been planning for a long while now. I JUST NEVER HAVE ANYTIME TO WRITE IT.
A lot of ideas, no time or energy to actually do it.
Anyways, I hope you guys are alright and have a nice day/night 🫶
