𝐘𝐎𝐔

in my head too

in my head 2.

i have no way to tell ricky that i like him.. it's hard to feel this way. why can't i just tell him without being weird and... making stupid decisions. i sat in 4th period, with my head on my desk.

after gina gave me that talk and the confidence to do it, it somehow didn't encourage me do it. and even if i did tell him, would he even like me back? would he say yes to being mine? is he even gay?... all these questions were running through my mind.

after fourth period, i walked out of the school building, speed walking to my car. not making any eye contact with anyone, as i was practically about to kill myself for being a dumb ass.

slamming my car door shut, i gripped the stirring wheel and pressed my head on the honker, making my car honk loudly, gaining attention from others.

"oh fuck you car!" i banged the wheel. man i'm really going through a mental phase right now.

on my way home, i stopped past the mcdonalds drive thru and ordered a large fry and large sweet tea. i parked my car in the parking and ate my brunch. thinking to myself, how i'm gonna tell ricky how i feel.. maybe i should text him? no. .

call him? hell no..

kiss him? that's too far, elijah...

hug him and tell him how much i'm in love with him? maybe... but nah.

stuffing a grab full of fries in my mouth, i sighed. watching as the world went by. i turned my radio on, not disney again.... SKIP!

i skipped until i started hearing barbie world by nicki minaj and ice spice. this song is a bop.

leaving the mcdonalds parking lot and making my home, i guess.

....NEXT DAY

"ricky!!" nini yelped approaching me.

"hey what's up?" i shut my locker, putting the lock on it. then she suddenly nudged me.

"you know what today is?"

"no? what's today..?"

"itsssssss my birthday!! you forgot?" she asked in pure confusion.

oh shit, it is nini's birthday. what a horrible best friend i am.

"uhhh my bad.. i did-"

"it's fine rick" she giggled.

"no, it's not, i'm sorry neens. how about we go out for your birthday?" i smiled.

"really?! can gina come!?" she said excitedly. i knew she liked gina. and she knew she liked gina, which makes it bad because gina is also my friend.. and it kinda sucks not knowing that someone likes you, especially knowing they're the right person..

wish i could say the same about elijah.

....

walking into school the next day was a struggle. woke up ten minutes after the usual time i wake up. couldn't find my hair gel, so now my hair was a mess.

"why is happening to me?" i sighed putting my face in my hands. as i heard a voice..

"h-hi elijah" the voice said. i turned around and there he was...

nervously licking my lips, i spoke "hi ricky.." we stood five feet away from each other.

"are you feeling okay? you look like you had a stressful morning" he walked closer.

oh believe me.. i did.

"y-yeah i'm fine." i replied, feeling the tension as he walked closer.. man i wanna fuck him so bad.

...

his hair was messy.. he made him look even hotter than ordinary days. get it together, richard.

we stood in absolute silence, before i spoke again. "so.. i'm gonna head to class before i'm late, i'll catch you later."

....

it's now or never elijah.

"i like you."

"huh?"

i said it. "i said i like you.." i looked down, clinching my fists. finally getting the lump out my throat. "you make me feel something i've never felt before .. y-you've just been in my head a lot and i cannot stop thinking about you." i looked up at him. he stood there, his face red.

"i understand if you don't have the same feelings as i do. but i just wanted to get that off my chest because the more i keep thinking about you, the more i fall for you, and it's driving me crazy-" i ranted with my eyes closed, as i felt lips on mine.

"you've been in my head too..."