Promised To The Clouds

Promise II

"Xiao Nuo.."

I heard the soft knocking on the door, and his voice, but I didn't even bother to turn in that direction. Since when did he begin to call me Xiao Nuo? Perhaps I missed that sort of important detail between us. But none of those details matter anymore.

Luo Yunxi doesn't matter anymore.

The door opened slowly, and the shuffling of the feet was heard as the person himself walked in, but that didn't make me budge even one inch. I was sitting on the bed, half leaning on the headboard. My eyes are looking out the far window, just staring at the cityscapes in the distance in silence.

"You've been sleeping in the guest bedroom since I was last drunk. I'm not drunk tonight; you can sleep in our room. The temperature regulators are more comfortable there."

"Our" room? You never looked like you even realised I left the room months ago.

I don't matter to him. I don't. There is no reason to care if I am comfortable or not. Everything that's happened in the past three months, and every single thing that did not happen between us as a couple makes sense to me now.

"Xiao Nuo, I know you must be in shock, but I really don't like to see you upset like this."

There was a shift on the bed as his weight settled beside me. A large hand landed on my cheek, as a thumb gently rubbed away a tear that had silently dropped. I didn't even realise when I started crying.

I must look like a fool to him. A fool that he easily scammed.

I looked down at his palm and finally looked at him. His eyes looked concerned, and worry was written all over his face. This looks real. This does not look like an act.

Taking his hand away from my cheek, I tore away from his eyes and looked down on his hands that were resting on the mattress instead. Did that hand really touch me just now?

Luo Yunxi actually touched me? This must be a joke.

"I don't want to see you right now."

His hand gripped the mattress, but he didn't say a word as he let out a low sigh. "Okay. I understand. I cooked you dinner, and it's on the table whenever you are ready to eat. I'll be in the study room."

My eyes looked back to the outside view as he slowly walked out the door. There was such a considerable amount of silence that I thought he had already left, but he gave one last sentence before he did.

"I have been busy with my tight schedule, and I should have done this earlier, but--- whenever you're ready, let's talk. I'll wait."

--

My appetite was obviously nonexistent, but his cooking is as good as it always is. I took a bite, and then I couldn't eat anymore. I glanced at the study room door, wondering if he really was in there right now or if he was out somewhere. The fact that he was in the house all afternoon and now in the evening itself felt like a lie.

I sighed at all the leftover dishes, knowing I wouldn't be able to finish them anyway. As I stood up to clean the table, the main door opened, and he definitely saw me with the bowl almost still full of rice and all the dishes looking untouched. With the sound of bags being shuffled, I assume he went to buy things.

"I'll clean them up. Just leave them."

I avoided his eyes, though I felt them burning into me with my every move. I nodded and started to walk off. A few steps later, I heard the clanking of dishes on the sink and water running, but I couldn't bring myself to walk any further.