Through the pain

Leave or stay

Leave or stay,
Continuing what I started here?
Is it time to find another way?
To leave behind my fears?
All those torments were in vain,
Which I remember every day.
And this pain bounds my hands,
Leaving the faith somewhere else.

Thoughts flow.
And there's a mess in my head.
I'm just a human after all.
But I'm sorry I reproached my fate,
Which is writing all these lines,
Trying to figure everything out;
To find the keys to this life,
But it continues bothering me at night.

However,
There's order in the written words.
My strength fell into disrepair...
It won't help. It only destroys.
Perhaps, so it will be.
Should I give a chance to fate?
But maybe it's time to leave?
Or is it better to find another way?
Leave or stay?