It's always been you

Safety

I recommend listening to a sad song while reading, just to set the mood!

Mine is no time to die by Billie Eilish<3
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When my father died, my mother completely broke down. I didn't blame her, how are you supposed to move on when you've lost your everything.

But all of a sudden I was left alone in a home, that now felt like an abandoned building, with my mom only stepping out of her bedroom once a day.

I was the one having to keep strong, even though I was just a 16 year old. I didn't even allow myself to cry out loud, scared that my whimpers would break my mother even further.

But at one point you break.

I clearly remember when and where I was, and who was there to help me...

I knocked on the door, standing alone out in the dark. The tears were streaming down my face, as I saw the lights turn on inside the Leclerc family home.

A tired Pascale, dressed in a nightgown, opened the door. Her face dropped as we locked eyes.
"Oh honey" She said gripping me tightly inside her arms. As she stroked my hair, I finally let out the whimpers that I had held in for weeks.

I let everything out, finally feeling the comfort I had been needing. I sobbed into her chest as I heard footsteps coming down the stairs.

Pascale pulled away, revealing her eyes, which were filled with tears as well now. I looked over to the staircase, to see a confused Charles.
"Charles go back to your room" Pascale said walking towards Charles. He stood there frozen, tears streaming down his face.

"Charles, go back to sleep" Pascale demanded, slightly pushing her 17 year old son up the stairs. But he stood his ground. "Charles.." Escaped my mouth, as I looked at him, I didn't want him to see me like this. "Amelia" He answered walking towards me.

"Charles let's do this tomorrow" Pascale said gently holding Charles back, but when she saw the desperate look in his eyes, she couldn't hold him back any longer.

He stood in front of me, his hair messy and eyes red.

I don't even want to think about how I looked.

He gently wiped away my tears with his thumb, cupping my face inside of his hands. I put my head against his chest, his arms wrapped around me. I quietly sobbed into his chest, feeling his shirt turn wet from my tears.

"Those sounds Amelia.. what happened?.." Charles asked, not being able to get the sentence out of his mouth without crying.

He had woken up to my cries. He had listened to my desperate whimpers.

I couldn't answer him, I couldn't do anything. I just stayed inside his arms. Charles pulled away, holding my face in his hands. He gave me one of those heart breaking sad smiles through his tears.

"Amelia if there's anything, ever, please come to me. I'm always he-" Charles assured but I didn't let him finish. I put arms around his neck, as he rested his head on my shoulder. "It's you and me Amelia.." He mumbled silently crying into my shirt. "Through thick and thin" I answered digging my hands into his hair, as we both silently sobbed in each others embrace.

Pascale pulled both of us into the living room, where she put on a random movie, and wrapped us in blankets. I laid myself inside of his lap, as he gently stroked my hair. I closed my eyes, finally feeling the safety I had been longing.

"Mom?" I heard Charles ask, my eyes still closed. "Yes honey" Pascale replied.
"Do you know what's wrong" he asked, his voice raspy and used. Pascale took a deep breath.
"Theo passed away last week" Pascale answered, gently rubbing Charles back. A small cry escaped Charles' mouth.
He had known my father his whole life.

Charles gently stroked my cheek as he quietly cried. "Poor girl" He whispered, giving my forehead a gentle kiss, his tears hitting my face. "I love you" he whispered into my ear, and with that i drifted off to sleep, feeling safe inside of his embrace.

The next day, Pascale brought me home, promising to help me out with the house.
"Go up to your room, while I speak to your mother" Pascale told me with a smile. I went up the stairs, but I decided to sit down on the steps, where I could still hear their voices.

"Elena darling" Pascale said as she entered my mothers bedroom. I couldn't hear much, but I assumed that Pascale sat down next to my mother in the bed. "You can't go on like this.. Amelia, she needs you" Pascale said in a gentle tone. My mother didn't answer. "You know she came by our house last night, and her cries.." Pascale paused.

"Her whimpers Elena, they were heart wrenching. That girl is absolutely broken, without anyone to go to" Pascale finished her sentence, and I could hear my mother starting to cry.

"Charles was woken up by her cries.. I've never seen my boy so heartbroken before.. Anyone who heard those sounds, would immediately break down" Pascale added, and my mother completely broke down.

I couldn't bear listening to her cries, with every sound leaving her mouth, my heart broke more and more.

Nothing hurts more than your mother crying

I quickly left the house directly going back to the Leclerc', back to Charles...

Me and Charles spend the entire day watching movies, barley speaking. But it didn't matter, simply his presence made me calm down.

"Charles?" I asked, my head resting against his shoulder. "Mhm" Charles replied looking down at me. "Can I go with you.. I just re-" I started but Charles cut me off.

"Like to my races?" Charles asked, and I nodded suddenly feeling nervous. But a smile appeared on his face. "I've been waiting for you to ask" He said giving me a sweet smile, his dimples coming through. He rested his head on top of mine, and I finally felt at peace, I finally felt safe.

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If you couldn't tell, this was a flashback chapter<3

I hope this made just some of you feel a bit sad aha:) love you all!