Emulous (h.s)

02

I long for the embrace of your scent, a memory that lingers in my thoughts. I find myself yearning to know if your essence, adorned by that enchanting coconut shampoo, remains unchanged, Mallory.

"Yes, Bridget. Uncle Harry is gonna be a lot fun." Mallory mumbles to her daughter as she sits on the other end of couch.

And this is it Mallory. Do you remember, this was how we were exactly situated like, when we first met? You and I were both on the other end of couch.

"How are you, Harry?" You're friendly. Shall I be concern? Are you gonna poison my food for what I've done to you?

I'd take it. In a heart beat, no question.

"I'm doing great. I see, you're having everything amazing too." I respond gazing away from her. I feel like drowning into those blue eyes.

"How was it in, North Carolina?"

"Zayn told you about it?" I question back. She shake your head. "I just remember." I smile.

"Are you guys friends too?" Bridget asks. She nods, "Your father, I and Harry. We all used to study along."

Bridget gasps grinning. "That sounds so awesome!" I smile at little girl's excitement. She adds, "Mom, I too will study with my friends!" Mallory hesitantly looks at me.

You remember that all Mallory. But you don't have to link what we went through, to your daughter. She ain't gonna end up having boyfriend—at least at this age.

"Where's Zayn?" I ask.

"He'll come in half hour." She still says half hour instead of 30 minutes. Maybe it's common. But I just note it anyways.

She's looking so pretty in this yellow dress. I wish I could tell her. But I shouldn't. What if deep down she is waiting for my complement? Shall I say it out loud?

I'll save it for some other day. Because she always looks gorgeous.

"Did you finish your homework?" Bridget shakes her head. Mallory tells her to walk upstairs.

And now we're alone. Mal.

She clears her throat as I toy with my fingers nervously. I look up and turn my body to face her. Her arms are crossed over and now she isn't behaving the same.

"So, what brings you here?" I shouldn't feel a dagger through my heart. I should've been ready for this.

"Zayn offered to stay..." She isn't softening her features. "And you though it'd be a good idea for you to agree?" She asks with unreadable expression.

I swallow the lump of my throat and open my mouth just to shut it back.

Yep. She doesn't likes me here. But I wonder if she's actually meaning what she's saying or she's just mad at me. It's been six years.. I thought I didn't feel the same for her but when I saw her—it's all coming back to me.

Yep. I shouldn't have heard the song by Cèline dion.

But radio doesn't plays what you want does it?

Her expression stays stoic, I thought, it was all good to tell, to make her feel better—but nothing I say could make her feel better.

She glares me for a minute. And I just sit here. But then, unexpectedly, her stern expression softens, and a smile tugs at the corners of her lips. "Of course, it's a good idea to agree! God; did it felt rude? I'm sorry." A wave of relief washes over me.

"I shouldn't have done that, Harry. I'm so sorry." Her laugh is music to my ear. I want to keep listening. I want to to press my lips on hers. I want her to smile against my lips. Just like she did when we first had our kiss.

Gosh. Everything about her is so beautiful.

I should leave. This is wrong. She's a wife now. Not mine, sadly.

You're a mother now Mallory. I shouldn't think like this about you. But is thinking as worst as doing? Because I know that at the end of the day I couldn't have you at all. I couldn't touch you. Hug you, kiss you. You aren't mine, Mal.

I sigh heavily, realizing how worse this is when she's right in front of me but belongs to another man—my high-school bestfriend.

The blonde women comes back and hands me a glass of water. I thank her. Welcoming me, she asks. "Would you like to have coffee, tea or juice?"

Mallory answers for me, "Mango juice." I snap my head to her direction and see her smiling.

The blonde nods and walks back towards kitchen.

"How's it to be mother of twin?" I ask trying to break the silence. Not that it was uncomfortable...okay I lied. of course it was.

I don't wanna picture everything those pregnency stages and Zayn being with her, supporting her. I mean, indeed he's only supporter because he's the husband.

I feel spark of jealousy raging in me, picturing Zayn and her together. Even I should get used to it. I feel like I never could.

•••

I fall back and lay on the bed. It was tough. It was tough tough. To see Mallory again with Zayn. When he walked in—pecked on her lips. Did what I wanted to do. He was stood next to her—just where I wanted to be.

I roll over my stomach and bury my face on the pillow. I'll leave right tomorrow. And will never be back. I won't see you again, Mal. I don't want to see you again. Because I don't know how long I could keep resisting the feelings for you.