Lieutenant Commander

Twelve

Five days later

It's the morning that I leave for the repatriation. Something I have been dreading for the last few days. Flying back to a war zone, to bring back the fallen. Everyone in Intelligence has seen me stressing about and they have noticed that I have been spending endless amounts of time in the locker room during shifts or just sitting alone in the breakroom. Adam and Jay have been the most concerned for me, as I'm not eating much at the moment due to my nerves and they've even noticed me falling asleep at my desk.

I'm not due to fly out till his evening, so I'm spending the day at the district to try and pass the time. Sitting on the bench in the locker room, with my locker wide open and just staring at my uniform before placing my head in my hands and slowly letting the tears fall down my cheeks. At this point of time, lots of things are running through my mind.

Why did I join the Navy?

Why did the Navy want me to this repatriation?

Does Steve know about the incident with the team?

My mind is just feeling scrambled. It's not like me to be feeling like this at all. I'm always on top form. Knowing what to do and what to say. Even how to deal with extremely difficult situations. But the situation that I'm currently being faced with, I'm not on top form. I don't know what to do. I don't know what to say. And I don't even know how to deal with this situation. It's like my entire persona, the way I work, has completely changed and I don't know what to do.

Adam's Pov

The last couple of days have been long. Especially for my wife. I'm starting to become concerned about her because ever since she came back form the Naval office, she's not been the same. I just want to be there for her but she slowly been pushing me away. I understand that but I just want to comfort her and just hold her and tell her that everything is going to be alright.

Sitting at my desk, trying to do some paper work from the last case that we completed. I came into the district early with Lilah to start the paper work and get it out the way, just in case a new case comes up. Since arriving at the district, Lilah has been in the locker room and that was just over an hour ago. I turn to look a the stairs and I see my brother in law walking up and then over to me.

"Morning Adam. You alright?" Jay asks me

"I'm fine bro. Just worried about Lilah. She's not been eating much the last few days because she has been stressing about the repatriation that she ahs to go on. She currently sat in the locker room and she's been in there for the past hour. She didn't even have her morning coffee before leaving the apartment. It's not like her. It's just like her persona has changed" I answered.

"I know what you mean. It's not like her. She's always on top of things and making sure that things are running smoothly. But the last few days, she just been in her own little world and not running like she usually is" Jay said with concern.

Lilah's Pov

After sitting in the locker room for over an hour. As I stand up from the bench, I wobble a little bit and started to feel a little but dizzy but I stabilize myself and open the door and head out to the bullpen and then I see my brother and husband talking. I lean against the door frame, as I feel another dizzy spell. I place my head on the door frame and as I shuffle, it catches the attention of the two most important men in my life.

"Hey sis you alright?" Jay asks with a bit concern.

"I'm fine, just tired. Nervous about lat.." I couldn't even finish my sentence before falling forward but Jay catching me just in time and then he helps me to my desk, so I could sit down and then Adam is at my side.