The Princess Who Returned

Chapter Five

I reached our spot in a few minutes, Our spot was a part of a park that served as a memorial to king Robert my mother's uncle and his brave party that ventured into the forest that separated Yale from the rest of the world. This park was the only access we had to the deadly forest and it was not much just a view of the tall trees the forest held from behind this fence that one could easily jump according to Aasha. We both used to come here every Saturday with two baskets laden with food and sit as close as possible to the fence on the request well more like insistence of Aasha. After we sat for hours talking about what could be found beyond the forest. It was common knowledge that there were other cities beyond the forest with people living vastly different lives.

We talked about wanting to know what was beyond but Aasha was really the only one who was obsessed with the concept. I did feel interested in knowing about the world outside but but I was still fine with what little information I had and found much greater joy in making conspiracy theories as opposed to knowing the truth which Aasha wanted. She wanted to see and do everything which I found weird then but now I could understand where she was coming from. This girl did not think she was going to live for long and naturally wanted to do as much as possible but she still kept her desires supressed because of her desire to spend her last days with her loved ones. That conversation gave me a deeper understanding of Aasha and so I was glad. I obviously missed her but it felt like I was only getting to understand the true her after her exit from this world.

If only I had known sooner, I would have made sure to complete the bucket list sooner. I would have made sure that when the time came she would go happy and satisfied that she had at least completed everything on her bucket list. If I had known sooner, I could have been there for her, I would never have raised my voice at her and I would have told her just how much she meant to me every day. If only I had known I would have treated her so much better.

No, I should not be thinking like this. Her being close to death should not be the determining feature, I should have treated her like that from the very beginning because of how much she meant to me and how great she was. I should have paid more attention to her; I should have already known she was suffering without anyone having to tell me. I was a terrible friend to her and she deserved so much better. I wanted to atone but she was gone so there was nothing I could do. This realisation made me tear up and with trembling fingers I tore the seal of the envelope.

The envelope contained a letter and a rose-gold, studded, heart-shaped locket exactly like the one I had wanted when we had gone shopping in town last week. I could not buy it then since my mother had forbidden me from buying anymore jewellery since I already had more jewellery than was healthy for a princess.

My fixation with jewellery had started last year and had not abated. I remembered the day I first saw this locket and absolutely fell in love with it. It had been a Saturday and we were returning from our picnic when I saw this locket being showcased in my favourite jewellery shop "The rabid moonstones" my first instinct was to go in and purchase it but I had been stopped by Aasha who reminded me that my mother had forbidden me from buying anymore since I already had two rooms full. I saw reason and did not go in but I kept complaining the entire way home and Aasha kept teasing me and rolling her eyes giving me the impression that she thought that I was acting overdramatic but this said otherwise.

This gift from her did nothing to quell my guilt and I did not expect it to, I think I knew I would feel worse and felt like that was the appropriate punishment for me but it still did not seem enough so I opened the letter. Even seeing her handwriting impacted me heavily.

Some time ago her warm hand ran over this paper writing words, comforting words because of how angelic she was. Words that probably gave encouragement, asked me to keep living, thanked me, told me how much she cared, told me not to blame myself but I knew deep down that those words would only elevate my guilt. I did not want to read it and feel even worse than I already was but I knew I deserved it. I could have done so much better if I had just paid attention and asked her about herself. I had to read it and repent for my actions, there was no other way so I took a deep breath and read: